


Wolves

by Zetal (Rodinia)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: And Dean breaks it up before anything can happen anyway, Bullying, Cas Needs All The Hugs, Dean Has No Patience For This Shit, Emotional Baggage, Family Drama, Kind of dubcon maybe?, M/M, Non-Traditional Werewolves, Schools Behaving Badly, They're both at animal intelligence, Wolf Cas, Wolf Sam, not abo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-04
Updated: 2016-03-25
Packaged: 2018-05-18 04:27:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 22,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5898208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rodinia/pseuds/Zetal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As long as history records, a small percent of humans have been werewolves.  Various cultures have handles their wolf population differently.  In the US, wolves are categorically defined as not human.  Various states have various levels of restrictions and protections for their wolves, but one thing common to all: a wolf becomes the property of their nearest relative as soon as they present on their eighteenth birthday.</p><p>Sam stopped worrying about being a wolf when his older brother turned eighteen.  After all, through some mechanism that still wasn't fully understood, either all siblings were wolves or none were.  So when Dean didn't turn, Sam figured he wouldn't either.  Then he woke up on his eighteenth birthday with fur and a snout.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Birthday Surprise

Sam had been looking forward to turning eighteen forever, so when he woke up covered in fur and with paws and a snout, he was somewhat discombobulated. And dismayed. He’d been looking forward to his freedom for the past three years – there were days when he felt like today was the only reason he had to live. It’s not that his dad was a bad person, but John Winchester expected his sons to fall in line like good little soldiers, and Sam was spectacularly bad at falling in line and being a good little soldier.

Dean wasn’t. Dean was very good at it, despite the fact that when John was gone, Dean was perfectly good at figuring out strategy and giving orders, even to people twice his age. Sam could handle the strategy part just fine, but he didn’t have the charisma Dean did. People followed John because John was the best there was and everyone knew it. People followed Dean because he could make you believe that he could lead you into Hell itself and get you out again.

Sam didn’t have either of those. Sam’s problem was that sometimes, he could see a better way to do things. Dean would listen. He wouldn’t always agree to do things Sam’s way, but he’d hear Sam out and give his suggestions due consideration. John wouldn’t listen. He told Sam to shut up and fall in line. Sam had been foolish enough to pick a fight after a mission went wrong exactly the way he’d said it would once, and that was the day he started counting down until his eighteenth birthday.

A countdown that now was dashed away. Oh, sure, he was eighteen. But he was a wolf. Two hundred years ago, when the wolves had first showed up in America, it had been ruled that they were not human and therefore not subject to human rights. Wolves were glorified pets, eternally the property of their nearest human relative. After the Civil War, all people were free and slavery was illegal – unless you were a wolf.

Dean threw open the door. “Sammy, come on, you… what the hell?”

“I don’t know,” Sam tried to say, but he was a wolf. It came out as a whine.

Dean came and sat on the bed beside him. “Well, this sucks,” he said, but he was petting Sam’s fur. “Damn, now I wish I’d paid more attention in class when they were telling us how this thing worked. I know you did, and when you can talk again I swear I will listen when you tell me what you’re gonna need from me and Dad and do what I can to make him listen too, but that doesn’t help us today.”

Sam whined again and laid his head in Dean’s lap. What he needed more than anything was an explanation. This was not supposed to happen to him.

Dean sighed. “Come on, we can’t hide this from Dad, so we may as well get it over with before he comes up here.” He stood up, and Sam hopped down from the bed to fall in beside Dean. Dean chuckled. “Well, at least you’re a big one. Even Dad can’t deny you can still be useful when you’re like this, at least against the fleshy monsters.” Sam hung his head. He hadn’t even thought of what would happen on hunts – he couldn’t research like this, couldn’t communicate, all he could do now was follow orders and fight. Well, that should please Dad.

When they got downstairs, John poked his head around the corner. “Dean? Thought you went to go get your brother out of bed. I know it’s his birthday but we got a zombie threat to end.”

“Uh… Dad, you might wanna see if Bobby’s got someone in the area who can handle this one,” Dean said. “I went to get Sam. And we’ve got a problem.”

John growled, and much to Sam’s annoyance, he found his tail automatically tucking between his legs. “Seriously? I figured he was gonna run off, but he couldn’t even wait until this hunt was over to have his precious freedom?”

“Sam wasn’t gonna run off,” Dean said. “Not yet.”

John asked the question that Sam was thinking but couldn’t verbalize. “Yeah? And you know that because…?”

“Because Sam ain’t like me. I dropped out of school pretty much as soon as it became an option for me, because I knew that lettin’ me finish wasn’t exactly high on your list of priorities and it wasn’t much higher on mine. It’s pretty damn high on Sam’s, and he’s only got a month left, so he was only running if you tried to make him move before he could graduate or after he was done,” Dean said, and Sam tried to laugh. “What the hell is your problem, Dad?”

“My problem is that brother of yours appears to have run off despite you thinking you know him so well!” John said. Sam was thoroughly ashamed of the whimper that came out as he tucked in a little tighter beside Dean.

“No, Dad,” Dean said. He looked down at Sam and then back to his father. “You’re that worked up about Sam running off – even without any kind of proof other than your own paranoia – that you haven’t noticed a giant wolf standing beside me?”

“A…” John jumped back when he saw the wolf. “What the hell?”

“Look closer, Dad,” Dean prompted, reaching down and putting a hand on Sam’s shoulder.

John looked closer. Sam fought the urge to look away when John met his eyes. “What… that… Dean, you’re gonna need to explain this.”

“Wish I could, Dad, but you know as well as I do what’s happening and I was hoping you’d be able to tell us why,” Dean said. “Sam’s a wolf.”

“That’s not possible. You’re not a wolf,” John said.

“I know. I’m not a wolf, Sam is, shouldn’t be possible and yet here we are,” Dean said. Sam let out a yip, knowing full well it wouldn’t be understood as disagreement but needing to try anyway.

John stared at Sam for a long time before answering. “There’s one way this is possible,” he finally said.

“Don’t you say it, Dad. Don’t you dare,” Dean snarled as he dropped to one knee to put an arm around Sam.

“You think I want to believe it of Mary? My _wife_?” John said.

Sam whined again, lowering himself to the ground. He understood where John was going with this, and he didn’t like it. The only thing worse than being a wolf who belonged to John Winchester was being a wolf who didn’t belong to anyone.

Dean glanced down at Sam, and something in his entire body hardened. “Actually, yeah. Go ahead. Please say it. In fact, can I get that in writing?”

“Dean?”

“You’re gonna say it’s possible because Sam’s no son of yours. Right?” Dean’s arm tightened a little at Sam’s whimper. “Well, I know for a fact that he’s Mary Campbell’s son, so he doesn’t need to be yours to be my brother.”

“Dean, he’s not…”

“I guess you could say I’m not Mary Campbell’s son, although anyone who ever saw Mom would know right away you’re lying about that, but even so, we were raised as brothers, always treated as brothers, I think I can count on one hand the number of days that have passed without you telling me to look out for my brother. Far as I’m concerned, he’s my brother, and any judge in this country would agree that even if a DNA test came back negative, long as I’m willing to claim him, he’s tacitly adopted and there’s no need to go lookin’ for his blood father,” Dean said. “So go ahead. Deny your son. That just makes him mine, which is better for Sammy anyway!”

John stood there, mouth hanging open as he stared at his boys. “Everything you said about him being raised as your brother is true of him being my son, too. Why do you think you get him?”

“Couple reasons. One, I saw the wolf in Sam’s bed this morning and my first thought was ‘crap, this means he’s not gonna be able to run like he wanted.’ Two, my second thought was ‘how do I help him deal with this shit that life’s dumped on him?’ Wolf or no, Sam’s my brother, I love him, and since he has to belong to someone, I got this. Your first thought was ‘Sam’s not my son.’”

“So, what, you’re sayin’ I don’t care about my son?” John demanded.

“All I’m sayin’ is that we both got a chance to react to the huge shock of Sammy being a wolf. One of us thought like a hunter, one of us thought like his family. What you read into that is all on you, Dad,” Dean said. “Now. You gonna fight me on this when you knew he was plannin’ on running from you anyway, or you gonna let me have him?”

“Don’t you think you should wait until you can ask Sam what he wants?” John said.

Dean snorted, looking down at Sam in amusement. “Sam, you know what’s goin’ on here, right?” Sam yipped. Dean let go of him and stood up, taking a step back. “You wanna stay with Dad, go stand by him. You know I’ll stay if you do, and I won’t take it personal. Go on. Tell us what you want.”

Sam didn’t even think before bounding up and falling in beside Dean again. His tail was wagging now, and he managed to make himself look at John without ducking his head in submission. Belonging to Dean wouldn’t be so bad.

“Guess that settles that,” John said. “I’m not disowning my son, but you want to take responsibility for a headstrong wolf who’s gonna argue with you and make your life difficult, be my guest. We got a zombie hunt to finish, and then you two can do whatever the hell you want. You come with me to the next hunt, you both fall in line and follow orders. You go find your own, good luck.”

“That one’s gonna be trickier. Hunt wraps up today, you willing to stick around until Sam’s got his verbal skills back so he can be in on the decision?” Dean asked, and John nodded. “All right. Let’s go hunt some zombies.”


	2. What a Wolf Needs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Dean talk about what Sam the Wolf needs and plans for the future.

The next morning, Sam woke up and stretched out. And kept stretching. It felt good to have human limbs again, but he quickly realized a problem. “Great, that just figures,” he muttered as he headed to his bag to get clothes. “Dean’s gonna love this one.”

Downstairs, he found Dean and John arguing. That also figured. “Good morning,” he said, and they both turned to stare at him. “Yeah, full moon is three days of wolf, but the initial transformation is just the one day unless it’s also a full moon. Full moon was last week.”

“Just surprised to see you up this early,” John said. "Thought you'd sleep in after the day you had yesterday."

Sam shot him a weird look. “I have school. Speaking of… I need to register as a wolf, so I can get yesterday’s absence excused and the full moon ones…”

“Gotcha,” Dean said. “I’ll drive you in and we can do whatever paperwork the school has for that.” Both boys turned to look at John, who just grunted and nodded.

“And then… zombie hunt’s nearly over, right, Dad?” Sam said.

John nodded. “Think we got ‘em all, I’m gonna stay here a couple more days to make sure. That spirit down in Tuscaloosa’s being handled, don’t have a strong lead on anything else.” He set down his coffee and looked at his boys. “Son, if I hadn’t been so convinced you were gonna run off the second you were eighteen, we’d have talked about this earlier. I know you don’t like the way I treat you, and you especially resent the way I treat your brother, and I know you want out. My plan was always to send the two of you boys off once I could send you off together. This wolf thing throws a crimp in that, but Dean’s right. I’m not gonna totally waive you off, but if he’s willing to step up and be your handler, I’m willing to let him. So let’s cut the apron strings now. When I leave, you and him follow if you want to, stay if you want to. Assuming no zombies show up, I’m leaving day after tomorrow. You have until then to tell me what you’re doing.”

 

The doors of the Impala had barely shut before Dean was talking. “I meant what I said yesterday. You tell me what you’re gonna need from me, and I’ll do my absolute best to make that happen for you.”

“Okay, well, what a wolf needs more than anything else is to know they have someone to belong to,” Sam said. “With you as my master instead of Dad, I’m not worried about that. You’ve always made sure I know you love me and want me around. When I look human, it’s less important to have a physical expression of it, but as a wolf, I won’t always be able to understand things, so it’ll help a lot if you’ll pet me, scratch my ears, things you’d do with a dog.”

“Okay, couple things I want straight right now: I know what the law says, but as far as I’m concerned, you don’t just look human. You are human. You’re my brother, and you’ll spend a few days furry, but in between full moons you’re a freakin’ person.”

Sam laughed. “Fine. Just remember the law won’t always agree, not that we care much what the law says about most things.”

“And the other thing, unless we’re havin’ to put on a show somewhere, I catch you calling me your master again I’m gonna kick your ass,” Dean said. “Handler I can just about deal with.”

“Again, I can go along with that, as long as you remember there will be times when for one reason or another I may have to call you master. I’m pretty sure South Dakota’s got a law that wolves aren’t allowed to call their handlers anything but master or mistress.” Sam thought for a bit. “I’m also going to need a collar.”

“What?” Dean took his eyes off the road to stare at Sam in disbelief. “I have to have heard that wrong.”

“No, you didn’t,” Sam said, trying not to laugh. Dean was taking this worse than he was, and Dean wasn't the one who had to wear the stupid thing. “I won’t wear it when I’m human unless I have to, but as a wolf, being properly collared is a safety measure for me. If I’m collared, it lets people know I’m a tame wolf, not wild, and you can take me almost anywhere you could take me as a human. And it’ll help with the belonging issue.”

“That’s gonna be a big deal, isn’t it,” Dean said.

“Yeah. Not belonging is a huge problem for a wolf. What else… as a human, I’ll be the same person I always am, but as a wolf, I’ll be a little different in some ways. For the first day, you’ll notice my intelligence fading, and it’ll recover on the third day, but on the middle day, the day of the actual full moon, I’m not gonna be much smarter than a particularly intelligent dog. And… oh, you’re gonna love this… you should plan on feeding me meat. Dog food’s probably fine, I wasn't nearly as picky yesterday as I usually am.”

Dean broke into a huge grin. “I can get you bacon cheeseburgers and you’ll actually eat them?”

“Yep, especially on day two.” Sam tried to think what else he needed to tell Dean about. “I don’t remember the transformations. I have no idea if I thrash around, make noise, do anything that would disturb your sleep. I do know that aside from my collar, if we get the right kind, I can’t wear anything when I go wolf, because it won’t come back when I turn back human. That’s gonna be a little awkward.”

Dean snorted. “Yeah, I’ll deal. Question for you… when you graduate, what do you wanna do? I need to do some research on state-by-state wolf laws, but if you wanna stick to wolf-positive states, I’m willing to work with that.”

“As long as you can deal with me putting on the proper wolf act in places like South Dakota, I don’t mind going there for hunts or to visit friends,” Sam said. “I know it doesn’t matter what the laws say, I’m gonna have more trouble getting you to treat your little brother like an equal than getting you to treat your wolf like an equal.” He hesitated again. “Dean…?”

“Yeah?”

“I, um… I wasn’t just gonna run,” Sam said. “I had a plan, a place to go. I’d stick out as long as I could take in the summer, and then at the end of August, I was going to college. Stanford.”

Dean’s jaw dropped as he stared at Sam. “Seriously? How were you gonna pay for that?”

“Full-ride scholarship,” Sam said. “I’ll show you the paperwork later.”

It took Dean a minute to find his voice. “Okay, so you graduate, we spend the summer hunting, with or without Dad, and then you go to college. I’ll… figure out some way to stay close enough to not set you panicking about belonging. Wow, Sammy, really? Stanford? That is freakin' impressive.”

Sam shook his head. “I may not be able to go now,” he pointed out to his brother. “It never occurred to me to check into their wolf policy, since I stopped seriously worrying about being a wolf when I was thirteen.”

“Yeah…" Dean said, thrown by that. "Hey, about that, aside from Dad’s theory, you got any ideas how this could’ve happened?”

Sam shrugged. “Actually, yeah, I do. Last semester for government I did a research project over asymptomatic wolves. It’s rare, but there are some people who have the DNA markers and whose siblings are normal wolves but who never transform themselves. Something screwy in the genetic makeup keeps them from reacting to the selenin compounds. You may be one.”

Dean nodded. “If it’s proven…”

“You don’t transform, so you’re still human, you can still be my handler,” Sam hurried to reassure Dean. “In the US, anyway. It means we shouldn’t ever go to Russia or some other countries, but let’s be real, we were never going there anyway.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Selenin: a hormone that is produced when the moon is nearly full, causing humans who produce it to change into wolves. From the Greek selen- meaning moon and -in, a suffix indicating proteins often used for hormones. Genetic markers exist for the production of selenin and can be tested for, but the tests are extremely expensive and not done except for people with more money than sense or in the case of problematic situations like Dean and Sam's where one sibling is human and the other is a wolf. Even then, paternity tests are done first, since that's the cheaper test and more common solution.
> 
> Why siblings are always an all or none case is still a matter of much research, given that traditional genetics would predict that only some children would present unless both parents were wolves.
> 
> (Yes, I was a biology major in college. Why do you ask?)


	3. Paperwork

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who knew that your little brother turning into a wolf came with so much paperwork? Dean follows through on his promise to do what he can to help Sam get to college.

When they got to the school, Sam led the way to the office. Mrs. Atterly, the secretary, lit up when she saw him. “Sam! We were so worried when you missed yesterday.”

“Why?” Sam said.

“Well, we couldn’t get hold of your dad, and it _was_ your birthday… we didn’t want to believe it, but you wouldn’t be the first drifter to drop out on their eighteenth birthday without notice,” Mrs. Atterly said apologetically.

Dean snorted. “Not even the first one in the family.”

“It wasn’t your birthday, Dean, you just didn’t enroll when we moved and you were close enough that the school figured it wasn’t worth the hassle,” Sam said. “Mrs. Atterly, this is my older brother, Dean. He’s here to register me as a wolf.”

The color left the secretary’s face as she stood up and came around the desk. “Oh, Sam, I’m so sorry.” She gave him a brief hug and went to get the forms. “Wait, how…”

“I’m not a wolf,” Dean said. “Dunno why. And Dad’s not claiming him, so…” He took the papers from the secretary and set about filling them out. “Sam, by the looks of these, I’m gonna be here a while, why don’t you go on to class and I’ll have ‘em call you if I need you for something.”

Mrs. Atterly blinked. “Sam, it’s okay, you don’t have to go to class today, we’ll take care of things with your teachers. What you went through yesterday…”

Dean grinned. “The worst part for Sammy was that he couldn’t go to school,” he said.

Sam rolled his eyes as he picked up his bag. “Dean’s not wrong,” he admitted. “I’m a giant nerd who likes school. Thanks, Dean.”

“Sure.” Dean reached out and squeezed Sam’s shoulder. Once Sam was gone, he settled into a chair with the paperwork and a pen. “I know my brother pretty well.”

The secretary turned very cold as she came to stand beside Dean. “Eighteen or not, wolf or not, Sam’s a good kid who deserves to be treated with respect. I hear rumors of you not respecting him, you will have problems.”

“Yeah, you don’t have to worry about me treating Sam as anything less than human or my brother,” Dean said. “Don’t care if he’s my half-brother or what, he’s a great kid who I’m gonna look after. Speaking of, any chance I could talk to his counselor? He was plannin’ on going to college this fall and I wanna see what I need to do to make that still happen.”

“Let me see if she can see you,” Mrs. Atterly said, warmth fully restored as she headed back. She returned shortly with the news that the counselor would be available in about an hour.

 

Dean had just finished the forms when another woman came out. Some of the questions made sense – he could see why they’d want to know Sam’s name, height, coloring as a wolf, blood type. Some of the questions made less sense, asking about his school disciplinary record, GPA, problems at home. And then there were the weird questions. Why would they ever need to know Dean’s favorite color? From what he’d seen of wolves and their handlers, a handler could treat their wolf however they damn well pleased, so did it really matter what Dean’s temperament was like?

“Mr. Winchester?” the woman said. “I’m Susan Edelman, Sam’s counselor. I understand you want to talk to me about Sam and college?”

“That’s right. Sam wants to go, I want him to go, but we need to figure out if he can now.” Dean handed over the paperwork. “I figure they’ll need to talk to me, and if we need to get Sam down here, we can.”

“Okay.” She sat at her computer and waited for the internet to load. “He was going at Stanford, as I recall. Thankfully, California is one of the most pro-wolf states around, and Stanford is pretty well-known to be progressive. Let’s see what their website says…” Dean waited while she stared at the screen. “All right. Well, it’s too late to indicate on the application that he’s a wolf, but as long as he sends in an official notification, he can still go. We can fax this over and that will serve. The scholarship will be trickier, because of you.”

“Because of me?” Dean asked blankly. He didn’t see what he had to do with anything.

“Sam’s scholarship includes room and board for himself only. A wolf on a full ride would get room and board for a handler, so that they have someone around to take care of their need to belong. Since they’re more expensive, they’re a bit stricter on who they grant them to. With Sam’s grades and financial situation – especially considering you’re his handler instead of your father – it shouldn’t be a problem, but there is an application process he’ll have to go through. No matter what, he’s taken care of, they’re not going to yank his scholarship because of this. I’m just concerned that the two of you wouldn’t be able to afford to cover the costs of you being there with him.”

“Yeah, that’s… where can I get the application?” Dean asked. “We lived in the area for a while and I remember it was really expensive.”

“Hold on just a minute, and I'll print it out,” Susan said. She left the room and returned with some papers. “Here you go. You can fill it out for Sam, if you don’t want to pull him out of class, since it’s for you too, and I’ll fax it when I fax the wolf registration.”

“Thanks, Mrs. Edelman. Sam’s gonna have a hard enough time dealing with this wolf crap, I don’t want him to have to lose this dream,” Dean said, as he began working on the application.


	4. School Wolf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean talks to Stanford.

Dean was surprised when his phone rang a few hours later. “Mr. Winchester, my name is Sarah, and I’m calling from Stanford University. We’ve received the paperwork for your brother’s registration as a wolf and application to amend his scholarship. Our committee has reviewed it, and we have a few questions for you. Do you have a moment to speak with me?”

“Sure,” Dean said. “Anything I can do to help Sam.”

“I’m sure you’re aware, typically, all the children in a family are wolves or none of them are. How do you explain your situation?” Sarah asked.

Dean shrugged. He knew she wouldn’t hear the shrug, but he was already sick of the question. “We’re not sure, Sarah. Dad’s theory is that Sam’s not his son, although if either of us aren’t his, anyone who knows us knows it’s me. Sam thinks I may be an asymptomatic wolf. It really doesn’t matter, though, I know we have the same mother and if I’m asymptomatic then I’m defined as human.”

“Is your father’s theory the reason he’s not stepping up as Sam’s handler?” Sarah asked.

“No. He’s not stepping up as Sam’s handler because Sam was planning on running away as soon as he had his diploma. I offered to be Sam’s handler instead, because I was pretty sure Sam running had nothing to do with me, and Sam chose me,” Dean explained.

"Is there any chance your father changes his mind and challenges you for control of Sam?" Sarah asked.

"Not likely, I think Dad's just as happy knowing Sammy and I are together and looking out for each other as he would be keeping us with him and dealing with Sam's resentment," Dean said.

“It sounds like you intend to allow Sam a great deal of freedom,” Sarah observed.

“He’s my little brother,” Dean snarled. “I know that by law he’s mine and I can restrict him however I want, but Sam’s a bright kid who’s got a good head on his shoulders. I’m not planning on restricting him at all, at least not using this.”

“That's good to hear, as that's Stanford's official stance on handler-wolf relations," Sarah said, and Dean breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you for your time, Mr. Winchester. We’ll see you in September.”

“You… does that mean you’re giving him the upgrade?” Dean asked. That was a quick decision.

“Yes, it does," Sarah confirmed. "We’ll mail the updated information to the address on file. When we first received Sam's application, his academic record and other factors got him flagged as a quick review if this came up. Our only concern was that your father might challenge you for control and refuse to allow Sam to come. Since that doesn’t seem to be the case, we’re quite pleased to have you and Sam here.”

“Thank you. Thank you so much.” Something occurred to Dean then. “Hey, uh, just in case… I don’t know when Sam applied, but we’ve moved fairly recently. What address do you have on file?”

“I don’t have it in front of me, but it’s in Sioux Falls, South Dakota,” Sarah said. “Is that your present location?”

Dean chuckled. “That’ll work. Thanks again.” Leave it to Sammy to have thought of everything he’d need to make this happen and keep it secret from Dad. He hung up just in time to hear the door open and Sam come in.

“Everything go okay with getting me registered?” Sam asked.

“Yep, everything's taken care of - except that you gotta call Bobby and tell him to keep an eye out for a letter from Stanford, college boy,” Dean said.

“What?”

Dean grinned at the gobsmacked expression on Sam's face. “Just got off the phone with someone from Stanford. Not only do they not have a problem with letting wolves go to school, your scholarship got raised to include the costs of me living with you.”

Sam was completely stunned now. Dean could tell by his inability to say anything but, “Huh?”

“Wolf needs a handler, even in California, so if you’re gonna live on campus, I get to, too. Stanford’s a pretty wolf-friendly school,” Dean explained.

“Wow, that’s… that’s actually really great,” Sam said with a huge look of relief. “I can really still go to college?”

“Yep! I won’t be going to classes or anything, but I’m sure I’ll find a job or something to keep me busy, pay for food and whatever the scholarship doesn’t cover that we need,” Dean said. “Surprised they got back to me so early, but so not complaining about you getting to know this now.” He reached out and ruffled Sam's hair. "Come on, let's get some sparring practice in before we lose the sun."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm writing ahead, and I had to take a break because I was making myself cry. So have a happy chapter.


	5. Collars and Chew Toys

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean takes Sam to buy a collar.

That weekend, Sam finally managed to convince Dean to go with him to the pet store. “This is degrading,” Dean grumbled. “Shouldn’t be buying things for my brother at a pet store.”

Sam chuckled. “Come on, it could be worse. You could be having to force me to accept the collar for my own safety. And it could be way worse for me, we could live somewhere that I’d have to wear it even human.”

“Don’t care how it could be worse, that doesn’t make it good,” Dean said. “How involved do I have to be in this crap?”

“Not much… the assumption is that you’d pick the collar, but there’s no rule that says you have to, you just have to approve of it. I really don’t care what it looks like, I’m not the one who actually has to see the stupid thing, and I don’t have any idea what my fur looks like to a human’s eyes. Advice would be welcome.”

“You’re not gonna just tell me to pick it out?”

Sam laughed. “If I thought for a second that wouldn’t mean I’d be getting some hot pink zebra stripe super-girly crap with rhinestones, I’d do that.”

“Hey, I’d never do that to you!” Sam just stared at him, and Dean backed down. “Okay. I totally would.”

“Yes. You would. Now come on, let’s get this over with.” Sam led the way to the wolf section of the store.

Dean stared in horrified disbelief at some of the products on display. “What the hell. Do they think wolves are pet dogs?”

Sam shrugged. “We’re furry and our human handlers can treat us however they damn well please and at least in wolf form we’ll love them unconditionally anyway. Not really seeing much of a difference aside from wolves are only part-time.”

“That’s fucked up,” Dean said. He shuddered as he looked at the squeaky toys. “How much of this crap are you actually gonna want?”

“I want a collar and something to chew on that isn’t a shoe so I don’t destroy anything important,” Sam said. “We can figure out if we need anything more than that after we’ve been through a couple moon cycles.”

“You know, it’s kind of ironic… you were always the one who wanted a pet dog,” Dean said as he went to look at chew toys. Sam laughed again. It was true. He went to look at collars, eventually picking out a simple, dark green leather one.

Dean nodded approvingly when he saw it. “Yeah, that should look good. I guess I should get tags for it?”

“Yeah, probably,” Sam said. “My name, your name, phone number. Not that I’m planning on running off or anything, but bad things do happen sometimes. I don’t need a rabies tag, at least.”

"That's good. How do you pick a chewtoy? I never thought about it with a dog, I don't think they care what they're chewing, but for you?"

Sam shrugged. "The short time I spent as a wolf, I didn't care either. It'll be fine, Dean. I know you don't have any idea what you're doing, and as long as you keep listening to feedback, I don't mind dealing with mistakes."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short one mostly just to post something while I'm watching the Super Bowl.


	6. Stray Wolf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam finds a stray wolf asleep in the back yard. Caught between wolf instincts to drive away the interloper and human instincts to help someone who clearly needs it, he ends up doing neither.

Sam stretched, feeling great. He’d survived his first full moon, and he actually felt really good. It was with great joy that his first act using his regained opposable thumbs was taking off the collar and shoving it to the bottom of his bag. Once dressed, he headed downstairs, where Dean threw an orange at him. “Welcome back to the land of the verbal, Sammy. How you feeling?”

“Great, really. You did good, I had fun and I’m not feeling any ill effects from the transformation,” Sam said. “How are you?”

Dean chuckled. “Glad to have my real brother back, although it was pretty nice having a dog for a while. I may end up getting you one of those fancy water tanks so you don’t have to remind me so often to fill your bowl. I thought the puppy dog eyes were bad when you were human.”

“Ha!” Sam headed out back for morning calisthenics. He stopped suddenly, a growl trying to escape as he looked around the yard. “Dean!”

Dean came out. “What?”

Sam pointed at a corner of the yard. There was a young man, about the same age as Sam, curled up there. He had a backpack beside him and a blanket half-over him, but other than that, was completely naked.

“Huh. That’s weird.” Dean stepped forward and knelt beside the guy, pulling the blanket up to cover him better. Sam couldn’t stop the growl anymore, causing Dean to look up. “Sammy?”

“Sorry, I’m sorry, this close to the full moon I still have some wolf instincts that haven’t faded yet,” Sam said quickly. “He’s a wolf. In your territory. Who isn’t yours. As your wolf, I have a pretty strong instinct to protect your territory. Don’t worry, I’m not gonna hurt him, and in a few hours I should be fine.”

“Weird. At least it explains why he’s naked,” Dean said. “Should we…”

Dean’s question was cut off when the strange wolf groaned. He sat up, and pulled the blanket tighter around him in alarm when he caught sight of Dean and Sam staring at him. He dropped his eyes to the backpack beside him. “I’m sorry. I just… I don’t mean to intrude. Give me a minute to dress and I’ll leave.”

“Not without breakfast,” Dean said. “I’m Dean, this is my brother Sam. What’s your name?”

“I don’t have one,” the guy whispered. “Call me whatever you like.”

“Well, Whatever You Like, get dressed and come on in, you look like you haven’t had a decent meal in some time,” Dean said. “Sam? You gonna be okay?”

Sam was struggling with the urge to growl, but he managed. “I’ll deal. Come on in, pal.”

The guy’s eyes went wide. “You’re a wolf. I should leave, at least until you’ve managed to shake the instincts. I’m so sorry, again.” He opened the backpack and pulled out some clothes, doing his best to dress quickly under the blanket. From what Sam could tell, it looked like he’d had a lot of practice at it.

“No, you should stay,” Sam made himself say. “If it weren’t for the instincts I’d be the one to have said it first, so please, come in.”

The guy shook his head as he rolled up the blanket and stuffed it into the pack. “No. I… my… I’m not supposed to accept…”

Sam flinched. “Your handler should take better care of you if he’s going to give you trouble for other people trying to help you.”

“Perhaps,” the guy said. “Nonetheless, I cannot accept your offer, although I do appreciate it.” He slipped the backpack over his arms and got to his feet, heading off.

Sam’s hackles settled over breakfast. He was halfway through his eggs and toast when he noticed something weird. “No bacon or sausage?”

Dean grinned. “Don’t expect me to keep that up, but I kinda figure the past three days you ate more meat than you’d eaten in an entire week before that, and you might like a break. Of course, if you’ve still got wolf instinct today, I probably should’ve done it tomorrow instead.”

“Yeah, but not your fault, you didn’t know,” Sam said. “Thanks for the thought.”

“Hey… what’s the deal with Whatever You Want claiming to not have a name? Surely his parents called him something when he was born,” Dean said.

Sam paused with his toast hanging out of his mouth to think, and suddenly his eyes went wide. “Technically, a wolf loses their birth name when they present. My name now is whatever you say it is. If you wanted to change my name to Thumbelina, you could.”

“Yeah, but still, his handler’s gotta call him something…” Dean said. “Really? Thumbelina?”

“If you do it, I will bite you,” Sam said. “And not necessarily. If a wolf’s name is whatever his handler says it is, then… a wolf without a handler wouldn’t have a name.”

“You think he’s a lone wolf?” Dean said, suddenly going serious.

Sam nodded. “He didn’t have a collar on, and he doesn’t have a name, and you saw him. If he were human, I’d have thought he was homeless. A wolf with a handler shouldn’t look that way. Shouldn’t be sleeping in random yards.”

“Okay. I know life sucks for all wolves, but a lone wolf? How the hell does he manage the need to belong?”

“He probably doesn’t,” Sam said. “Kinda wonder if that’s why he wouldn’t stay for breakfast, because if he doesn’t have a handler it’s not because his handler wouldn’t let him. I don’t know what it feels like beyond descriptions in the psych textbooks and stories about wolves, but if the longing is really as bad as they make it sound, it may be just too hard for him to be around a wolf that doesn’t have to worry about that.”

“Man. And we just let him walk away,” Dean said. “Poor guy.”

Sam set down his toast. “I may be able to track him,” he offered quietly. “If we go now, while the wolf is still fading.”

“And then what? Insist he come back here for something he pretty clearly doesn’t want? I dunno, Sammy.” Dean shoveled some eggs into his mouth. "If we see him again, we can push harder for him to let us feed him, but I'm not comfortable stalking a guy." Sam nodded. It wasn't exactly good, but Dean was right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you've enjoyed the relative fluff; time to take a look at the other side of wolves.


	7. Wolf Tutorials

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam gets pulled out of classes for makeup tutorials, where he spots the guy from his back yard. Another wolf tells him about the guy, and Sam invites him to come over for dinner.

When he got to school the next day, Sam’s first period teacher sent him to a room where he saw about ten other kids, nearly all seniors. He sat next to one of them he knew from his English class. “What’s this all about, Kate? Future Lawyers of America?”

Kate gave a halfhearted laugh. “Wolf Support Group. Everyone here’s a wolf. With having had Sunday to recover, it’s not such a big deal, but when we still have some of the residual instincts it’s not always a good idea to let us go to class right away. So we’ll spend the morning in here getting tutored for what we missed over the full moon, and they’ll send us back to class this afternoon. They even hire wolves to tutor us, just to prevent instincts from causing problems over competing for the tutors' attention. You’re so lucky, you only have to go through this once.”

“Lucky. Yeah. That’s me, all right,” Sam said, letting some of the bitterness out finally. He’d been trying to keep up the good cheer, and mostly succeeded, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t pissed off at the way an accident of genetics had changed his entire life. It had honestly helped that Dean was so vocally pissed off about it for him.

Kate just nodded. She understood. He was about to say more when a late arrival caught his eye. It was the guy from his yard. He pointed the guy out to Kate. “Who’s that?”

Kate looked over, and her face took on an expression of sympathy. “We call him Castiel. That was his first name, before his birthday. The wolf thing sucks for us, but at least we have family. My mom’s been pretty decent about everything, and they’re already working with my little sister to prepare her for what’s going to happen. Encouraging her not to give up and to continue having dreams. It's a problem with wolves who have older siblings, they know much younger what's gonna happen so they just sit back and let it." Sam wondered what would have happened to him. He couldn't imagine just sitting back and accepting being his father's pet dog for the rest of his life, but if he'd known it was inevitable, maybe he would have. "Castiel, well… compared to him, we’re lottery winners. His family basically imploded.”

“How come I haven’t seen him around school?” Sam asked. It was a big school, but not that big. He recognized the book Castiel had pulled out as AP Calculus, and if he was that smart, Sam should have had a class or two with him. 

“You weren’t here before he presented, when he was in normal classes,” Kate said. “He was one of the most popular guys in school – smart, rich, played football, never had a bad word for anyone. When he presented, well, most of us first-in-our-family wolves describe it as our lives crashing down around us. For Castiel, it really was like the end of his world. Coming here is about as much as they let him be around other people, mostly for his own protection.” Sam wanted to ask more - isolation was the last thing that he could imagine would be in any wolf's best interests. But the teacher in charge came in then, ready to get them started on their makeup work.

 

After an hour and a half of silent work time, the wolves were given a fifteen-minute break. Sam stood up and went over to Castiel. “Hey there. You okay?”

Castiel looked up, surprised at someone coming to talk to him. He was even more surprised when he recognized Sam. “Oh. Hello. Yes, I’m as well as can be expected.”

“Good to hear,” Sam said. “Hey, listen, Dean and I feel really bad about letting you take off without breakfast yesterday. There any chance I can convince you to come over for dinner?”

“I told you, I can’t…” Castiel started.

“You also told us you don’t have a name, which means you don’t have a handler,” Sam said quietly. “My wolf instincts have faded, you’re not gonna be causing problems for anyone, there’s no reason you can’t take some food and some company.”

“Does Dean know you’re inviting me over?” Castiel asked.

Sam shook his head. “I didn’t even know you went to this school, I’m fairly new and hadn’t seen you around. But I promise you it won’t be a problem.”

“No,” Castiel said. “Talk to Dean first. I won’t be a source of conflict between you two.” 

“I don’t need to ask my brother’s permission to invite a friend over,” Sam said, temper flaring. So far, this had been the worst part of being a wolf. Everyone questioned his judgment and his ability to make decisions. Everyone, that is, except Dean. Well, at least, Dean didn't question him any more than he had before the wolf thing. Dean _was_ still an older brother. It felt like he was going to be perpetually twelve years old sometimes.

“Maybe you don’t,” Castiel said. “But I need your handler’s permission to enter his territory. Especially after having taken advantage of it once, which, again, I apologize for.”

“Where do you normally sleep?” Sam asked.

“Wherever I can find shelter. Often in the park, in alleys behind local businesses, never the same place two nights in a row so that I don’t get run off. My favorite place is breaking into a yard that once belonged to someone I called family who would have supported me had things gone differently, but I don't dare go too often because it now belongs to another person I once called family who told me he'd shoot me if he ever saw me again,” Castiel said. “As a wolf, I’m more likely to trespass into someone else’s yard, because I don’t understand enough to know why I shouldn't. I consider it a good month when I don’t manage to lose my backpack and blanket during the worst of the brain loss.”

Sam had so many questions for Castiel, but this wasn't the time or place to ask. “Fine. I’ll ask Dean, and when he says yes, how do I find you tomorrow to tell you?” Sam asked.

Castiel looked skeptical, but answered anyway. “You can leave a message with the main office. Mrs. Atterly is rather fond of me and she’ll make sure I get it. Tell her the message is for Castiel.”

“Can I call you Castiel? Or is there something else you’d prefer?” Sam asked.

“Castiel will do, if that’s what you want to use,” Castiel said. “It was chosen by my mother, so I don’t feel I have to abandon it fully.” Before Sam could ask, Castiel was gone, heading for the classroom door.


	8. Unexpected Wolf Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel had it all, once. But then he learned the truth about his family, and his life changed irrevocably.

Life had always been easy for Castiel Ryder. He was the only child of Michael Ryder, the CEO of a successful courier service. He was smart, strong, and despite the wealth and privilege he’d been raised in, he had a good heart and was always the first to help when one of his classmates was in trouble, whether that was needing tutoring so they wouldn’t flunk math or trying to find a way to pay for their mom’s cancer treatments.

The first shadow entered Castiel’s life when his mother Anna disappeared. Michael did everything he could to find her, but after six years, Castiel had given up hope. Anna wasn’t coming back.

Michael and Castiel had made big plans for Castiel’s eighteenth birthday. Castiel was going to miss school to spend the day with his father, something that rarely happened because Michael was so busy with his work. When he woke up covered in fur, he didn’t know what to think, so he did what he’d always done when he didn’t know what to do. He went to his father.

Michael looked down at the wolf, the shock on his face slowly fading into a cold anger. “This isn’t possible. There’s never been any history of wolves in my family.”

Castiel whined and laid down at Michael’s feet. Michael just stared at him. Castiel rolled onto his back, and Michael turned away, calling for his personal assistant, Naomi.

“What do you need, sir?” Naomi asked.

“Cancel our plans for today, Naomi. I need to take Castiel for blood testing,” Michael said. Castiel rolled back over. He didn’t understand Michael’s attitude. Sure, him being a wolf wasn’t exactly a good thing, but Michael was acting like it was the end of the world. Or at least, the end of their family.

Naomi nodded. “What clinic?”

“I’m taking him to Gabriel. Where else would I go?” Michael asked. Gabriel Pratt was Michael’s stepbrother and the owner of a chain of blood testing centers.

Naomi shrugged. “Given the nature of this one, I wasn’t sure if you’d want family involved yet or not.” She turned and pulled out her cell phone, dialing as she walked back to her office.

 

Michael didn’t say a word to Castiel on the drive to the testing center. Gabriel met them in the parking lot. “Holy crap, I thought Naomi was joking,” he said when he saw Castiel curled up on the back seat of Michael’s Lexus. “Good thing we still have Anna’s DNA on file from when she was trying to find her birth parents. Should be able to have results for you in a couple days, bro.”

Michael nodded. “Thanks for this, Gabriel. It’s always good to know who your true family is.”

Gabriel looked sympathetically at Castiel. “I know, bro. Go on inside, Uri’s waiting to do your cheek swab. I’ll get Castiel’s DNA.” As soon as Michael was gone, Gabriel knelt beside Castiel. “Hey, kiddo. I don’t know what your dad’s thinking. I’m hoping the test comes back positive, but if it doesn’t, I’ll try to knock some sense into him. Now, open your mouth?”

Castiel complied with a whimper and tried to hold as still as possible while Gabriel took the cheek swab. Once the swab was stored, Gabriel scratched Castiel’s ears. “You’re a good kid, Castiel. Your dad knows that. Try not to worry too much about this, okay?”

 

Waiting for the test was almost pure hell. Castiel tried to go about business as normal, but that was impossible with Michael refusing to sign the paperwork for school until he had the test results, and refusing to speak to Castiel at all.

Four days after his birthday, there was a knock at the door. Uri was there, and Castiel took him to Michael. “I have results for you,” he said.

“Well?” Michael said.

Uri handed over a manila folder. “It’s not good,” he warned as Michael went to open it.

Michael read quickly. Once again, shock crossed his face to be replaced by the coldest rage Castiel had ever seen. “You’re sure about this?”

“I ran the tests myself, Michael. Twice.” Uri met Michael’s eyes. “I’m sorry, but this is the truth. You’re not Castiel’s father. Gabriel is.” Castiel shook his head. He can’t have heard that right.

“Just out of curiosity, why’d you run Gabriel’s DNA?” Michael asked, ice dripping from his voice.

“There were rumors about him and Anna, going way back,” Uri said, not fearing Michael at all. “I heard them from Luce, so that tells you just how far back they went." Michael's brother Luce had been serving jail time for embezzlement since before Castiel was born, and kept getting time added to his sentence for various violent charges in prison. "Since you were so sure you weren’t the father, I figured I may as well check them out, it’s not like it’s hard to get a DNA sample from Gabriel.”

Michael nodded. He turned to Castiel. “You’re not my son. You never were. I have no obligations to you. You can take whatever you can carry, but I want you out of my house before I get back from going to have a chat with my stepbrother.” He stalked out of the room with Uri at his heels.

Castiel was numb. This couldn’t be happening. He picked up the manila folder Michael had left behind and looked at the test results. There it was, black and white: he wasn’t a Ryder. Well, Gabriel hadn’t seemed too upset about him being a wolf, and Castiel felt sure that when he showed Gabriel the test results, Gabriel would do the right thing and take him in.

He went to his room and got his backpack. He wasn’t going to be able to take much, he knew, although he might be able to convince Michael to let him come back for more once he’d settled in with Gabriel. Castiel got some clothes and looked longingly at his bookshelf. He’d need his textbooks for school, and between that and some clothes, he didn’t have room for much. He took down his Bible and tucked it on top of his backpack.

One last look around, and Castiel was leaving. He didn’t quite know where to go – it was probably a bad idea to try to go to the clinic, and Gabriel wouldn’t be home for several hours yet. He ended up heading down to the library for a few hours.


	9. Bad to Worse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel's visit to Gabriel does not go as he'd hoped. There was probably a way it could have gone worse, but damned if Castiel can figure out what it is.

At 8:30, Castiel arrived at Gabriel’s house. Gabriel’s car wasn’t there, so Castiel sat on the porch to wait. He must have fallen asleep, because he was shaken awake. A glance at his watch told him it was after midnight. “What the hell are you doing here, kid?”

“Waiting for my un… my f… my uncle to get home from work,” Castiel said. He yawned. “Have you seen him today?”

“Nope. It’s not all that weird, though." The guy looked curiously at Castiel. "You’re Gabriel’s nephew?”

“Sort of,” Castiel said. “It’s a long story, but I really need to talk to him.”

“Well, no good sitting out here, if he’s not back by now he won’t be back until three or four,” the neighbor said. “I’m Abner Sarver. I’ve got a couch you can crash on so you don’t get the cops called on you, if you’d like.”

Castiel considered. Tomorrow… today, actually… was Saturday. If Gabriel really wasn’t going to be home for several more hours, he’d probably be there when Castiel woke up the next morning. “Thank you, Mr. Sarver.”

 

Abner shook Sam awake about ten o’clock the next morning. “Hey, kid. Your uncle still isn’t home, but there’s a cop car outside his house. You might wanna go over, see what’s going on?"

“Thanks,” Castiel said, stretching and wiping the sleep away. He headed over and saw the door hanging open. “Um… hello?” he called into the house.

A woman came to the door and pulled out her badge. “Detective Wilson. Who are you?”

“I’m Castiel Ry… um… I’m Castiel. For now. Gabriel Pratt’s my… it’s complicated, but I’m family,” Castiel stammered out. “What are you doing here?”

The detective winced. “Come inside, Castiel. This will probably take a while to sort out. What’s complicated about your relationship with Gabriel Pratt?” She motioned for him to take a seat in the living room, sitting across from him and taking out a notebook.

“Well, until yesterday, I thought he was my father’s stepbrother,” Castiel said, opening his backpack and pulling out the manila folder. “Turns out he’s my father.”

“Oh.” Detective Wilson took the folder from Castiel and looked at the test results. “Oh, Castiel. This… this may be very important. I’m so sorry about the timing, but your father was found stabbed to death at his clinic this morning. My partner and I are here trying to find out whatever we can.”

“What?” Once again, Castiel was numb. “That’s… why would anyone want to kill Gabriel?”

Detective Wilson looked at the folder in her hands. “Stab in the dark... is it possible the man you thought was your father felt so betrayed by his stepbrother’s affair with your mother he could have killed him?”

“That’s ridiculous,” Castiel said. “That’s… Dad would never…” Then the rage came back to him, and Castiel felt real fear. “Maybe. Dad… Michael Ryder… was still angry about… about me being a wolf. Finding out that I’m Gabriel’s son instead of his may have been enough to push him over the edge.”

The detective jotted down the name. “Okay. I take it you were here to confront Gabriel with the evidence that he’s your father?”

“Yeah, Dad… Michael… threw me out. Gabriel promised to try to talk some sense into him about me being a wolf when he took the DNA sample, so I came here to show him the test results and ask him for help.” Castiel sat back in the couch, heart sinking. “What happens to me now?”

“What do you mean?” Detective Wilson asked.

Castiel fought back the tears that were stinging his eyes. Whatever hope he'd had left was, apparently, dead on the floor of his own clinic. “I mean, Michael threw me out and refuses to have anything to do with me, and since I’m not his, the courts can’t force him to deal with me. Mom’s been missing for six years. And now Gabriel’s dead. Mom grew up in the foster care system and never knew her birth family, I don’t think Gabriel has any other family. So what happens to me now?”

“You’re eighteen, you’ll find a way,” the detective said. Then she looked up from her notes. “Oh. You’re a wolf. You’re supposed to belong to a family member. And you don’t have one.”

“Exactly,” Castiel said.

Detective Wilson went out to the car. When she came back a while later, her face was colorless and she was shaking a little as she sat back down. “Michael Ryder was just arrested for the murder of Gabriel Pratt. It’s gonna be a slam dunk case, not even all his money can argue with the security footage and witnesses. I checked in with the station, and they said that without family, you’re a lone wolf. If there’s someone in Michael’s family who might be willing to take you in, you can try to convince them, but otherwise… you’re on your own.”


	10. Life as a Lone Wolf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel learns just what it really means to be a lone wolf: bullying, lack of support from people who are supposed to protect him, and generally a crap life. But then, one possible bright spot arrives.

Castiel was indeed on his own. The Ryders blamed him for Michael’s disgrace, and refused to have anything to do with him. As far as Castiel knew, Gabriel didn’t have any family, and the Ryders weren’t looking to enlighten him. Detective Wilson had promised to let Castiel know if she learned anything, but when Gabriel’s will left everything to Michael, his brother Luce, their other stepbrother Rafael, and the clinic, Castiel figured there wasn’t much hope. At school, when he registered himself, he had them put Castiel Wolf as his name since they had to put something. At first, everything seemed normal. He went to class, did his work, played football, and hung out with his old friends. Slowly, though, Castiel began to realize things were different.

Basketball tryouts were Castiel’s first clue that something was irrevocably changed. When he checked the date, he realized that they were being held during a full moon. So he went to the coach.

“Huh. It is,” Coach Halbert said. “What’s your point?”

“Well, I played the last two years and I want to play this year,” Castiel said. “But if tryouts are during a full moon, I can’t come. Is there a way I can do an alternate tryout some day either just before or just after the full moon?”

The coach put down the play diagrams he’d been flipping through. “And then what? If you make it, we reschedule games because oops, our guy can’t make it that day, it’s a full moon? You get to miss three days of practice and then expect normal playing time? A wolf can’t commit to sports the way a human can.”

“Coach?” Castiel asked, hoping he wasn’t understanding right.

“It wouldn’t matter when tryouts were, kid,” Halbert said. “I’m not having a wolf on my team, especially not a lone wolf. You were a good player and I’m sorry to lose you, but you weren’t good enough to be worth the locker room disruption.”

“I see,” Castiel said. “Thank you for your time, Coach.” He turned and walked out, heading for the nearest bathroom. He barely made it before he was vomiting, sickened by the rejection. When the vomit stopped, the tears started.

Naturally, of all people, it was Dirk McGregor who came in and caught him. Castiel could not believe this day. Dirk had hated him before, because Castiel would help the people he bullied fight back.

“Oh, look, a sad puppy,” Dirk said. “I’m sorry, puppy, what happened? Your handler buy you an ugly collar?” Castiel didn’t answer aside from wiping the tears from his face as he got to his feet. “Oh, wait. You don’t have a handler, do you? Do you even have a collar, or are you feral?”

That stung. Castiel didn’t have a collar, it was true. What little money he was able to come by, he spent on food. That didn’t make him feral, did it? “Dirk, just… I’m going, okay? You win.”

“Is the sad little puppy afraid? Fraidy-pup?” Dirk shoved Castiel into a wall. Castiel didn’t shove back. He just turned to go. As he left, Dirk leaned out the door. “Yeah, that’s right, puppy, tuck your tail between your legs and run!”

 

It only got worse from there. The next time Dirk started in on him, Castiel fought back. That got Dirk a black eye and Castiel a week of in-school suspension. After that, the other bullies at the school realized that Castiel was an acceptable target in the eyes of the administrators.

First semester finals went terribly. For three years, Castiel had been a straight-A student. Now he was failing finals. Castiel went to do the only thing he could think of to prevent him having to give up the one bright spot he had. “What’s wrong, Castiel?” Mrs. Edelman asked when Cas dropped by.

“I can’t take this anymore,” Castiel whispered. “Is there anything I can do aside from drop out that will get me away from these kids? I… I don’t want to drop out, not with college on the horizon, but if I stay here with the bullies I’m scared of what might happen to me.”

Mrs. Edelman nodded. “Now that your finals are in, I’ve finally managed to convince our administration and your teachers that yes, this is an actual problem and not just boys being boys who will get over it when they find a new toy. Castiel, I know that isolation is bad for wolves, but I’ve worked out a deal with your teachers and the principal to treat you like you’re in AEP. They’ll send you work, you’ll do what you can on your own, and if you need help we’ll arrange for tutorials. You’ll still go to the wolf moon catchup days, you haven’t been having trouble with other wolves, have you?”

“No.” Castiel couldn’t quite decide whether this sounded good or not. It was still better than the alternative, though. He could finish school, where he got food twice a day five days a week, and it wasn’t like dropping out would make him any less isolated. “Thank you, Mrs. Edelman. I appreciate you setting this up for me.”

 

It was a long semester and Castiel struggled to teach himself the material his teachers sent. Most of his teachers agreed to let him retake his finals, and he did much better, but the isolation wore on Castiel hard. He sometimes faked struggling with his work just to have an excuse to interact with someone. As May came to an end, he was starting to seriously wonder how he’d survive after graduation.

He was writing a practice essay for the AP Literature test when he heard the door open. Mrs. Atterly came in, an odd look on her face and a folded note in her hand. “Hi, honey, how are you doing?” She sat beside him and gave him a quick side hug.

Castiel was ashamed to admit just how much he’d come to appreciate even a small gesture like this. “I think I’m doing all right, but it’s an essay. I’m terrible at essays, not sure if this is actually any good. Thanks for coming by, it’s always good to see someone friendly.”

“Well, I didn’t just come by,” Mrs. Atterly said. She handed him the note. “This is for you.”

Castiel took the note curiously. It was written in clear block letters. “Hey, Whatever You Want, Sammy said he invited you for dinner but you wouldn’t come unless I said it was okay. No more excuses. Come let us feed you. 6:00. Dean.” At the bottom, in a much more scrawled writing, was added, “And this is Sam saying hi so you can see I didn’t fake the note.”

“Did you read it?” he asked the secretary.

She shook her head. “I don’t know what Sam had to say to you, but he’s a good kid, not a bully. I figured it was safe.”

“Oh. Do you know anything about his handler?” Castiel asked.

Mrs. Atterly shook her head. “I’ve met him, and he seems decent enough. He certainly treats Sam well. If anything, Sam’s been better since his birthday than he was before. But I don’t really know Dean at all, so I don’t know what to tell you.”

“Hmm. Thank you,” Castiel said as he set the note aside and returned to the essay he was supposed to be writing, thinking hard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *AEP: alternative educational placement. This is usually used for disciplinary purposes - kids whose behavior is either so egregious or so frequent that they need to be out of the regular classrooms for an extended period. It's more serious than in-school suspension in that it's not on the same campus. In Cas's case, it's punishing the victim, but he is still on the regular high school campus, just isolated. The school took the easy way out, punishing the loner who didn't have anyone to protest instead of tackling the actual problem, the bullies on their campus. Sadly, this is all too often true in real life, too. "Boys will be boys" is a damaging mentality; "middle school girls are mean but they'll get over it" is just as bad.
> 
> (Sorry, as an educator and a bullied kid, I get a little soapboxy on this issue.)


	11. Dinner with Wolves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel comes over and gets to know the Winchesters a little better.

“Think he’ll show?” Dean asked when Sam got home from school.

Sam shrugged. “I hope so, but I don’t know. From what it sounded like, he’s been kept isolated so long, I’m thinking he may show up just so people will talk to him.”

“That sucks,” Dean said. “Everything about being a wolf sucks, seems like.”

Sam shrugged. “It’s a crap hand to get dealt even if you get supportive family to take care of you… I mean, even me, one bad hunt where you and Dad both get taken out and I’m in Cas’s shoes.”

Dean snorted. “No, you aren’t. Not if you have the sense to get yourself to Bobby or Pastor Jim. They’d never let you suffer.”

Sam was going to protest some more, but he was interrupted by a knock at the door. He ran and threw it open, a huge smile lighting up his face. “Castiel! You came!”

“You invited me, repeatedly. It seemed rude to continue to say no,” Castiel said. “I’m sorry, I know it’s customary to bring a gift for the host, but…”

Dean waved a dismissive hand. “Don’t worry about it, man, Sam and I aren’t exactly masters of manners ourselves. Just glad you’re here.”

“I really do appreciate the invitations,” Cas said. “It can be hard for a lone wolf. There are a lot of people out there who are perfectly happy to take advantage of us, and I’ve had to learn to be careful in who I trust.”

Sam flinched. “Ow. Yeah, I can imagine. Just like those assholes at school, no one does anything about a wolf getting mistreated unless their handler goes to bat for them.”

“That’s what convinced me to come, Mrs. Atterly thought Dean seemed to intend to treat you well. Doesn’t guarantee he’d be good to a lone wolf, but it’s certainly more likely from someone who doesn’t even treat their own wolf well.”

Dean huffed. “Yeah, not an asshole. Seen enough people who kick someone when they’re down to decide I’m not gonna do that.” He started heading toward the kitchen, but came back, a frown having taken over his face. “Wait a minute, Sammy. What assholes at school? I need to go raise a fuss on your behalf?”

Sam laughed. “No worse than it was when I was just a scrawny nerd who wouldn’t fight back so I didn’t have to try to explain why I could. It's really not bad, I can handle it for the three weeks left between now and graduation. Go keep dinner from burning.”

“I take it Dirk and his friends are still picking on wolves?” Castiel said as Dean headed off, grumbling under his breath about little brothers who are too sacrificing for anyone’s health.

“Wolves, nerds, people who look different, whatever excuse they think they can get away with, yeah, bullies are universal. Although… only Dirk I know is Dirk MacGregor?” Sam was extremely startled when Cas nodded. “Dirk’s one of the most victimized kids at school. They call him Dirk the Jerk, push him around for not being able to handle a … oh.” Now Sam felt like a complete idiot.

“Yeah. That was me,” Castiel said, a faint smile coming to his face. “Dirk and I never got along even before, and he was one of the main reasons I went to solitary, so you’ll forgive me if I don’t feel bad for him getting a taste of his own medicine.”

“I dunno… he’s in a pretty bad place, and I know you are too and he’s partly responsible for that, but…” Sam trailed off, not quite sure where he was going with that.

“Trust me, Sam, you didn’t know him before,” Cas said. “I’m sorry he’s struggling, but if he can’t take it, he shouldn’t have spent the ten years before that dishing it out.”

“Fair enough.” Dean interrupted then, calling Sam in to set the table for tacos.

Once everything was settled, Castiel bowed his head quickly. Sam joined him, assuming Castiel was praying. Dean didn’t, but he also didn’t interrupt. “What are you doing after graduation?” Dean asked once they were finished. 

Castiel paused in filling up his taco shell – much to Sam’s amusement, with no meat. “Surviving, I hope. I’m getting out of this town, hopefully I’ll be able to find work, although there are even fewer opportunities for lone wolves than there are for normal wolves.”

“Not going to college?” Sam asked. “I saw what you were studying at wolf support group, you’re definitely college material.”

Cas shook his head. “I was, I’d applied and been accepted conditionally last year, but even if the college would take a wolf, I have no way of paying for it now. I had an academic scholarship covering tuition and books, but Michael made too much money for me to get housing and food covered.”

“You might try calling them,” Dean said. “Sam’s got a full scholarship, and when they learned he was a wolf they raised it to cover me, too. Apparently they set money aside for that kind of emergency, at least at Sam’s school. Can’t hurt anything to ask.”

Castiel swallowed a bite of taco. “No, I suppose it can’t,” he said. “I’ll see if I can borrow a phone at school to call tomorrow.”

“If you can’t, you can come over here and use ours,” Dean offered. “You shouldn’t miss out on school because of some dick genes.” Sam raised an eyebrow at Dean. “What? He’s a nerd like you. I basically stole you from Dad so you could go to school.”

Sam huffed. “No, you made Dad acknowledge that he’d already lost me so he may as well not try to hold on too tight.”

“Tomato, potato… you wolves get a crap shake, I’ll do what I can to help you make the best of it,” Dean said. “Not saying I’m gonna paint the Impala silver and start marching in the People Are Wolves parades, but if there’s something I can do to help a wolf who needs it…”

“I did once,” Castiel said. “March in a PAW parade, I mean. Mom took me when I was ten years old, a friend from college’s nephew had just turned. I had a great time and wanted to go back the next year, but Michael said no. Guess there’s not anyone who can tell me that if I wanna go march this year, is there.”

“Nope,” Dean said. “Aren’t there lone wolf support services, trying to match them with handler candidates who are willing to take on a wolf? If there aren’t, there should be.”

Castiel shook his head. “Not that I know of, although if they do exist, PAW would probably be a good place to ask. The problem is that there aren’t that many humans who are willing to take on a wolf unless they have blood ties or a mate’s claim. For good reason… when we’ve lost our minds to the moon, we don’t necessarily recognize friends unless they smell like family. And it can take time to establish a family link between strangers.”

Sam and Dean looked at each other, and Sam could see Dean thinking the exact same thing he was. It hadn’t taken much time at all with Bobby Singer, or Jim Murphy, or Caleb, or Jefferson. “Maybe not normally, but it can happen quickly given the right circumstances,” Sam finally said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this update's so long in coming! I got almost nothing done this past week, aside from sleeping and going to work.


	12. Stray Logistics

When Castiel left, Dean came back to the table after making sure Castiel had somewhere safe to go for the night. “Sammy.”

Sam looked up from the homework he'd retrieved, wary at the tone of Dean’s voice. “What?”

“We’ve had this talk before, although admittedly this is a much different context. We can’t take in strays, not the way we live,” Dean said. He sank back into his chair and reached for a bottle of whiskey.

Sam gave him a very confused look. “I know that…?”

“I like the guy too, but even if we end up staying here all summer instead of heading out and hunting, we’re taking you to Stanford in the fall,” Dean continued. “Seems cruel to…”

“No, Dean, I get it,” Sam said, his confusion worsening. He wasn't a six-year-old begging for a puppy anymore, he understood how things worked for them. “Although hopefully his school will be as cool as Stanford and he’ll get to go too, now that he’s actually checking on it.”

“Even if they are, he’s still gonna be somewhere else,” Dean said.

Suddenly, it hit Sam where Dean was going with this. “Wait a minute. Dean, are you trying to talk me out of asking you to adopt Castiel, or using me to talk yourself out of it?”

“I barely know what I’m doing with you,” Dean said. “I can’t… you’re easy, you’re my brother and we’ve always had that deep unshakable bond, if I screw something up with you, you know it’s because I’m an idiot, not that I don’t care. After what Castiel’s been through, what happens the first time I screw something up there?”

“Then you’ve screwed something up and Castiel or I tell you how and why and what to do instead,” Sam said. “Dean, no wolf gets a perfect handler, especially not at first. There’s a period of figuring out what the hell’s going on, on both sides. What’s important is the reaction to the screwup, not that it happens. You learn from your mistake and do what you can to fix it, that’s huge.”

“Is it enough, though?” Dean asked, sitting forward. “I mean, there’s still the issue of going to college, but if we can find a way around that…”

Sam shrugged. “It’s enough for me, Dean. I’m not Castiel, I can’t say if it would be enough for him, but my gut feeling is yes. There’s also the issues of Dad and hunting. You always loved hunting, you never liked the idea of giving it up even after we get the thing that killed Mom.”

“Cas is a big boy, I’ll tell him the basics and whatever else he wants to know before asking him,” Dean said. “And Dad… what the hell business is it of his? We're on our own now, unless we meet up for a big hunt or a beer.”

“You’re still his son, you don’t think he’d consider it his business if you start talking about hooking up with a wolf – and a guy, at that?” Sam said.

The whiskey shot out of Dean’s mouth. “Who the hell said anything about hooking up with him?” he sputtered as he reached for a napkin to start cleaning up the table.

“Uh… that is the usual way a handler takes on a wolf who’s not blood-related,” Sam said, wiping the whiskey spit from his shirt. “Not what you were planning?”

“You kidding me? Nothing against Cas, but you don’t think that’d be a little… weird?” Dean said.

Sam snorted. “Yeah, because no handler’s ever realized that they can do whatever they want with their wolf and decided that includes hooking up with them. You could hook up with me and no one would say anything about it. Hardly be the first.”

“Ew,” Dean said. “Don't take it personal, but… you’re my _brother_. That's just wrong.”

“And most handlers are either the wolf’s parent or cousin,” Sam pointed out, not that he disagreed with Dean about the wrongness of it. “Unless they’re the wolf’s mate.”

“Again: ew.” Dean made a face. “No, I have no intention of hooking up with Castiel. You’re pretty good about telling me to go to hell if you don’t like something I tell you, but based on what we've seen, I'm thinking he’ll take a while to get to that point. He can’t say no, then saying yes don’t mean anything.”

“Good to know you think that way,” Sam said.

Dean smirked at Sam. “Besides… sure looked to me like someone else is ahead of me in line,” he teased.

Sam ducked his head. “You know I’d get out of your way if you wanted him.”

“Wolf thing?”

“Kinda, yeah, I guess, but even before, I’d have gotten out of your way for someone we both liked,” Sam said.

Dean shook his head. “Not if I beat you to it. But I’m seriously not interested in Castiel, not like that, so feel free to go for it. Still doesn’t solve the college issue…”

“Wonder where he’s looking at going,” Sam said. “If he ends up coming over tomorrow to use the phone, ask?”

“Yeah. Okay.” Dean paused for a moment, sipping the whiskey in silence while Sam got back to his homework. “So you like the idea, if we can figure out the college thing and he can deal with the crazy that comes with hunting?”

Sam grinned, dimples coming out. “Yeah. I know we can’t save every stray, but I liked him, you liked him, it’s not like ‘I just met you and you’re already my family’ is new for us. I wasn’t gonna ask, but since you’re already thinking that way, I’m behind it a hundred percent if we can figure out how to make it work.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, sorry about the delay. Real life has been kicking my ass the past few weeks. February tends to do that to me. Didn't help that I *still* can't decide if I need to post this chapter or if I should skip it!


	13. School in June is Pointless

Cas opened his calculus book. It was how he liked to start his morning, since he was good at it, and the calculus assignment usually set the tone for the day. He started reading the assigned section and groaned a little. It wasn’t looking good when he was lost within two paragraphs.

A knock at the door distracted him. Very few people ever came out to his classroom, and the few who did never bothered to announce their presence by knocking. Cas went to the door and was very surprised to see Sam standing there. “Hey!”

“Hello…?” Castiel said, staring at Sam in confusion.

Sam came in and dropped his bag by one of the desks – Castiel’s study room was originally used as a storage room for the school’s extras. As Castiel watched in growing bewilderment, Sam pulled out his English book and a stack of papers. He didn’t seem inclined to explain.

Finally, though, Cas thought he might have a guess about what was going on. “Are you having problems with bullies, too?”

“Huh?” Sam looked up, and eventually broke into a grin. “Nah. If I were, Dean would be up here demanding to know what the school was gonna do so that he wouldn’t have to commit a few felonies to take care of me. Some of the people in the office noticed me reaching out to you at wolf support group and put together a plan for me to come out here if I was just gonna be doing bookwork or whatever in class anyway. They thought it’d be good for you to have some company, and I’m happy to go along with it, so… hi!”

“Hi…?” Castiel was still confused. Then something struck him. “Sam, no, I’m used to the isolation, don’t sabotage your own education to try to help me.”

Sam snorted. “Bull. If I need help with my work that you can’t give me, I can go to class the next day and get it. And I'm supposed to be talking to you, so it's not like asking you for help is breaking some unwritten rule. But come on, it’s June, we’re seniors, most of the teachers are basically shutting it down. There’s not just a whole lot going on in class aside from watching movies.” Castiel found himself unable to deny the truth of that statement. It showed even in the work they sent out to him that most of their teachers were pretty much done with school. “Besides, the classes I’m coming out here for… they all think it’s a great idea.”

That was reassuring, although there was still one more major concern. “Does Dean know about this?”

Sam laughed. “Yeah, and he wants to know why we didn’t think of it first. Said to say hi and see if you were able to call your school yet.”

“Oh,” Castiel said. Well then. “I suppose I should stop staring at you like a nincompoop and get back to work, then.”

“Probably,” Sam agreed. “Were you able to call your school?”

“Yes. They were actually very understanding, and promised to review my case and have an answer for me before school lets out for the summer,” Castiel said, settling back down to his calculus work.

“Hope it works out. Where are you going?” Sam asked.

“Nowhere yet, I’m not counting on my luck suddenly turning,” Castiel said, although he had to acknowledge that things had changed greatly since meeting the Winchesters. Maybe it would hold. “Stanford’s hard enough to get into, and…”

“Stanford? Really?” Sam interrupted, his face lighting up in a huge smile. “Dean is so gonna accuse me of making that part up.”

“I’d show you the old acceptance letter, but I left it behind when I had to leave Michael’s home so suddenly. I figured I’d get it or Gabriel would get it for me, when I’d settled in with him, but…” Castiel shook it off. “Why would you make that up?”

“I can’t really tell you, not until I’ve had a chance to talk to Dean, but that’s where I’m going in the fall. So hopefully I’ll see you there!” So Dean wasn’t so different after all. Castiel felt irrationally disappointed by that, somehow. Sam noticed. “Hey, no, that’s not a wolf-needs-permission thing. Dean and I were talking about something I don’t think either of us thought there was much chance of happening, you going to Stanford changes that, but I feel like I should check in with him before I say anything else to you.”

“I… see?” Castiel said helplessly. He didn’t, but he also wanted to let Sam out of the dilemma.

Sam accepted it and changed the subject. “Hey, do I need to get another note from Dean if I invite you to come for dinner again tomorrow?”

Castiel considered. Finally, he decided, “If you’ll promise not to lie to me about him knowing you’ve invited me and welcoming the intrusion, I’ll come. After all, tomorrow’s Friday, one or both of you might have better plans for the evening.”

“Dean, maybe,” Sam said with a slightly rueful smile. “I didn’t date much before the wolf thing, and between that and graduation being so close, I’m really not looking to start unless something really exceptional comes along.”

“Understandable,” Castiel said. He fought back the disappointment. It’s not like he’d believed he had much of a chance to begin with. Still, the fantasy was nice, and he was curious. “Do you know what your brother’s approval process for your dates will look like?”

Sam made a somewhat rude noise. “Dean will tell me that whoever they are, they’re nowhere near good enough for me, but that I should go for it anyway if I disagree. He may pull handler rank if he thinks I’m getting abused or something, but not just because he doesn’t like my date. I guess that’s one of the very few upsides to being a lone wolf, if you find a girl who likes you, your handler can’t say no.”

“Boy, but other than that… and they can’t force me to accept a mate I don’t like,” Castiel agreed. “I’d still rather have a handler, but there are a few good points.”

“Boy, huh?” Sam said. “Cool.”


	14. Offer Made

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel comes to dinner, only to discover the Winchesters are not at all what he thought they were. They're crazy. But some kinds of crazy are better than others.

Castiel rang the bell, trying to calm his nerves. Dean had been perfectly welcoming last time, and Sam had promised not to lie to him. There was no reason to expect anything different.

Still, it was a great relief when Dean answered the door. “Hey! Perfect timing, food cooked a little faster than I expected so everything’s just hit the table. Come on, hope you like mac n’ cheese. It’s kind of my specialty and Sam thought you’d appreciate it.”

“I don’t know that I’ve ever had mac ‘n’ cheese. But I’m not picky. It’s better than the dog food I usually eat, I expect,” Castiel said. Dean laughed.

The food was delicious and both Winchesters were talkative, telling stories about life on the road. It was entertaining, hearing about all the places they’d been, and Castiel couldn’t help but envy Sam’s good fortune in having an older brother like Dean.

After dinner, the tone changed abruptly. Dean shoved his chair back from the table a little. “Cas, do you believe in ghosts?”

“I…” Cas tried to figure out where the question had come from. “Not really, no. Why?”

“What about vampires?” Sam asked.

“No? What…”

“Monsters?” Dean interrupted.

Cas raised an eyebrow. “You mean other than wolves and human monsters like Uncle Luce? I don’t know. They could be real, I guess, but I’ve never seen any real evidence of them. I take it you two believe in those things?”

“Hard not to,” Dean said. “Given that the family business is saving people, hunting monsters and ghosts and things like that and killing them.”

Cas went cold. It was hard for him to believe that these boys, these kind boys who were so devoted to each other and welcoming to a stray like him, were psychopaths or delusional serial killers. It was easier to accept the existence of monsters. So, at least until he had better evidence otherwise, he’d play along. Maybe they were just including him in a long-running game the two of them had started playing when they were children, to help make their lives more bearable. “Okay. Why?”

“Something killed our mom when I was a kid. Sam was just a baby, he doesn’t even remember her,” Dean explained. “Dad started investigating, and before too long, he’d gotten us into this business. He raised me and Sam in it so that we could find the thing.”

“And have you?” Cas asked.

Dean shrugged. “We don’t even know what it was, honestly. But we have killed a lot of things that have been threatening a lot of people. There’s a lot of folks alive because of my dad, and because of my brother and me.”

Sam’s voice was quiet as he said, “You think we’re crazy, don’t you.”

“Well, maybe a little, but…” Cas admitted. But then something occurred to him, and he couldn’t hide the fear. “You’re not gonna kill me, are you?”

“What? No!” Sam stared at Cas in horror. “I know how it sounds, us talking about killing things, but that’s just it. We kill _things_. Not people! You’re not a monster. Everything I’ve heard, you try to help or avoid people, not hurt them. Why would we kill you?”

Cas tried to calm down, but he couldn’t. “Because I’m a lone wolf. People are afraid enough of tame wolves, of wolves with families and handlers. Lone wolves are the boogeymen they use to make their children behave. We’re also easy scapegoats, because we don’t have anyone to stand up for us. So if another monster were causing trouble around here, you might blame me for it.”

“Okay, that’s fair,” Sam said. “But we wouldn’t pretend to be your friend first. That’s not how we work. We’re not pretending anything with you. We like you and want you to come hang out with us more often.”

“As in, when Sammy graduates, we’re blowing town,” Dean said. “We’d like you to come with, since you’re wanting to leave too, but not without knowing what you’d be getting into.”

“If you do want to come, we’ll wait a week, get through the full moon and make sure that you and I won’t have problems there,” Sam added.

Castiel looked between them, brain racing. Could this be real? These boys… it would be a nice dream. There wasn’t exactly much chance that Sam would accept him during the full moon, but could he pretend for the next three weeks? Accept that maybe, just maybe, there was a light at the end of high school? He needed more information, first. “If you weren’t after the feral wolf, what were you here for?”

“Zombie infestation a few towns over,” Sam said with a shrug. “Dad parked us here for me to go to school and drove over with Dean to investigate. It’s how we work, a little separation between the job and where we’re living, because of the lies we tell to do the job.”

“Zombies?” Cas asked.

“Zombies,” Dean confirmed.

“Here?”

“Maryville, but close enough,” Sam said.

“And now?”

Dean grinned. “Corpses. Been keeping an eye out, it’s rare that Dad and I both miss something but it’s not unthinkable, and nothing.”

“And you want me to come with you,” Castiel said, still trying to get his brain around the conversation.

“Sure,” Dean said. “Dad thinks we’ve lost our minds, but he already thought I’ve lost mine because I fought him for Sam. He had some rather fun names to call me.”

“Why do you want me? I don’t know anything about this stuff. I don’t know what’s real and what’s not, even. And while I can hold my own in a fight against a human, I’m no warrior, I’d probably freeze if you asked me to take on a… a zombie,” Castiel said.

“We’re not recruiting you as a hunter,” Dean said. “You don’t wanna fight, we can leave you at the motel or in the car while we go take down the big bad monster. Dad did that with us until he thought we were old enough to help out. We want you to come with us because we like you and, for once, the life we have to offer someone is actually a step up from what you’d be facing on your own.”

Castiel couldn’t deny the truth of the last part. He’d much rather face the literal monsters with friends at his side than face the figurative monster of loneliness by himself. But the first part of their logic didn’t quite ring true. “You barely know me.”

“Yeah, and?” Sam asked. “I’d known Bobby Singer all of ten minutes before I adopted him as the father Dad wouldn’t be and Dean shouldn’t have to have been. Dean and me, we’ve got pretty good instincts about people.”

“And… what happens when you decide you don’t like me anymore?” Cas asked.

Dean shrugged. “Could happen, I guess, in which case we’d probably have some awkward times in the Impala. Wouldn’t keep you prisoner, but you ain’t gotta like family to be good to them. Lord knows there were times where Sam and I could not get along for anything. I’m actually more worried about you, here. At some point, you’re gonna realize I suck at being a wolf handler. I have no idea what I’m doing, aside from taking care of Sammy. You’re not Sammy, so I’m gonna fuck it up. You decide you want out, or even just realize I’m not being what you need and want me to try to change something, you gotta tell me.”

“Dean, you…” Castiel had no idea what to say here. He honestly didn’t. “Are you sure you want to take on a feral wolf? There’s no way to force the kind of bond…”

“We don’t think we need to force it,” Sam said. “There’s no way to know for sure until we see what happens during a full moon, but at least on our part, we think it’s there already.”

“And lone wolves are known to be sluts when a bond is offered,” Castiel said. “So if it’s there, I should latch on.”

“Not the way I’d have put it, but yeah, which is why we wanted to get the offer out there well before the full moon, when you were in control of your instincts and could say no if you didn’t wanna take that risk,” Dean said. “You sign on with me, I can’t promise I won’t fuck up. What I can promise is that you’re with me as long as you wanna be with me, that you have the same freedom I’m giving Sammy, I’m not gonna change your name or tell you what classes you’re taking or who your friends are or are not. Twenty-five days out of twenty-eight, you’re a grown boy who can make decisions and tell me what you want. The other three, I’ll take care of you, and if there’s something you want me to change about how I’m treating you then, tell me when you can.”

Castiel was stunned. “I… I can’t… I can’t make this decision tonight, it’s… it’s too big, and I didn’t… I never expected… this is what you were talking about yesterday, Sam? The idea that me going to Stanford made possible?”

Sam nodded. “You understand now why I couldn’t say anything more without talking to Dean. It’s not because I need his permission because I’m a wolf, it’s because if he got cold feet after I’d made the offer…”

“Yes, I… I get that,” Cas said.

Dean held out a piece of paper. “You said that we barely know you, well the same goes for you and us, you know. So this is our dad’s phone number, along with Bobby Singer and Jim Murphy, the people we’re closest to. We’ve told them what we’re thinking, and they’ve agreed to talk to you before you make any kind of decision if you want. If it’s me you’re worried about, call Bobby, if it’s Sam, call Pastor Jim.”

Cas took the paper and unfolded it to look it over. He held up the ten-dollar bill clipped to it. “What’s this for?”

“If you decide you want to give this a try, then I’m gonna ask you to get yourself a collar,” Dean said. “If it doesn’t work out, Sam says the collar’s a safety measure for a wolf, so it’ll still do you good to have, but if you get it yourself then it’s not tied to me at all. If you decide you don’t wanna do this, you can do whatever you want with the money.”

“Including return it?” Castiel said. Dean nodded. “I’ll… I’ll think it over. After all, I don’t even know for sure about Stanford yet…”

“Yeah, and if they don’t give you the extra money, that could be a problem,” Dean said. “We’ll just have to cross that bridge when we come to it and hope there aren’t trolls.”

“Trolls are real?” Castiel said. 

Sam laughed. “Not that we’ve ever run into. Doesn’t mean they’re not, just that we haven’t seen them. We tend to be a lot more open-minded about what’s possible, because of what we’ve already seen. But we do have some skepticism, and trolls are pretty high on my skeptic list. Right behind Bigfoot.”

“I keep telling you, Sammy, Bigfoot’s out there,” Dean said. “You’ll see. One of these days, you’ll see.”

“Yeah, yeah, and then I’ll spend the rest of my life hearing about it,” Sam said. He rolled his eyes and looked to Cas. “This from the guy who refuses to believe in angels at all.”

“If angels are real, where the hell are they? They’re sure doing a crappy job looking after humans,” Dean countered. “Aside from Victoria’s Secret, those kind of angels I am perfectly happy to believe in.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know. They haven't quite bumper stickered it yet.


	15. Free and Useless Advice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stunned by the offer from the Winchesters, Castiel weighs his options.

Castiel spent the entire weekend thinking. Although Dean had told him that he was welcome to come by for food or company whenever he wanted, what he needed to give himself space to think. He liked the Winchesters, certainly, and when he was with them, he could definitely feel the draw into their pack. The respect Dean had for Sam, even as a wolf, was obvious, and it spoke well of him that Dean was so concerned about making mistakes.

He stared at the list of phone numbers Dean had given him. The only thing he needed to know about Sam was how they would handle their time as wolves. For his part, he wasn’t worried; he knew he was the interloper and that as a wolf, he would likely submit to whatever treatment Sam gave him without fighting back. But he also knew that a human’s personality was rarely indicative of a wolf’s. He had no way of knowing what Sam would do if the bond he claimed to feel wasn’t transferred to his instincts.

He was more worried about Dean. Dean meant well. That much was obvious. But he hadn’t been a wolf handler long, and the wolf he knew was the little brother he’d practically raised. While Cas wasn’t about to hold honest mistakes against Dean, he really had no way of predicting what Dean’s expectations for taking in a stray were. Some things Castiel expected. Buy and wear a collar, show gratitude, accept rules and limitations. Those went with the territory with any handler.

He’d heard the stories in wolf support group. Most were reasonably positive, once the family got past the shock, but he’d watched three wolves drop out because their handlers saw no point in wasting education on their pets. He’d read the stories of lone wolves – most became beggars, criminals, sex workers, or otherwise marginalized members of society. Some couldn’t handle the loneliness. The suicide rate for lone wolves was eight times higher than tame wolves, and there was an even bigger gap compared to the general population. Even those who found a family weren’t guaranteed a happy ending. Once the commitment was made, there was no backing out, not by the wolf. If the handler turned out to be abusive or controlling, there was no recourse.

What Castiel needed wasn’t to hear from John Winchester what Dean was like, or Bobby Singer, or someone else who knew the Winchesters but didn’t know wolves. What he needed was advice from someone who knew wolves. He’d sworn, back in October when he’d gone to a wolf shelter for a few days, that he was never talking to them again. He’d hated it there. The humans in charge mostly reminded him of his father, and not in the good ways. The proprietor, Zachariah, could have passed for family among the Ryders. Right down to the condescending, hateful attitude about wolves.

But the day he’d left, one worker had given him a card and promised that he could call her if he ever needed anything. He hadn’t done it. He was too afraid it would somehow be a trap. But now… the risk was worth it. He found the card tucked into his physics textbook and dialed the number.

“Heaven’s Wolves Shelter, you’ve reached Rachel Alvar,” the greeting came.

“Rachel, I don’t know if you remember me, I stayed at the shelter for a few days months ago. A lone wolf, going by Castiel.”

“Castiel! I remember you,” Rachel said warmly. “You found the shelter too close to home and decided to go it alone instead of staying. Are you all right? How can I help you?”

“Well, I’ll be graduating high school soon, and…” Castiel briefly summarized the past two weeks. He left out the monsters, but made sure to say, “They’ve been very honest with me about the dangers of their contract work. But I wouldn’t be alone.”

Rachel’s voice was sympathetic. “It almost sounds too good to be true, doesn’t it?”

“Yes. Yes, it does, and I can’t stop the part of my brain that’s telling me I’m overthinking this and that chances are good they’re exactly what they say they are, but I also can’t stop the part of my brain that’s telling me there’s going to be some huge hidden catch in this, that if I do this, I need to be prepared for it to go horribly wrong somehow. You don’t know these boys in particular, I know, but I was hoping you’d have some advice for me.”

“Well, normally I’d say trust your instincts, but it kind of sounds like that’s why you’re calling me, your instincts are conflicted,” Rachel said. “Not knowing the boys, I really don’t know for sure what’s best for you. I will remind you that if you choose to do this, and things go badly, there are shelters you can run to, places like ours that will hide and protect wolves as much as possible. But you chose life on your own over a shelter, so that may not be as much use to you as it is to others.”

“Do you believe in fate, Rachel?” Castiel asked. It was something Michael and the rest of the Ryders were big on. God was in his Heaven, and he had a plan that he would bring about in whatever way he could. If you were one of God’s favored, like the Ryders, then you could count on good things. Castiel had always tried to live up to what God asked. His faith had been badly damaged, thanks to his time as a lone wolf.

Rachel chuckled. “I believe in God’s plan for everyone. I just don’t think it’s always fair, and I encourage people to make their own plans. Fate takes away free will, and I can’t accept that.”

“Hmmm,” Castiel said. “Rachel, forget the specifics of the case – in general, would you say that a lone wolf is better off remaining alone or taking a risk on a handler?”

“There’s too much that it depends on to ignore the specifics, Castiel,” Rachel said. “Based on what you’ve told me, my gut instinct is that you’re better off taking the chance. But I don’t know enough to make that a solid recommendation.”

“I appreciate your time, Rachel,” Castiel said. “I should go.”

“I wish you luck, whichever way you decide to go, Castiel. And don’t hesitate to call me if you need anything, even some free and useless advice.”


	16. Collar Shopping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel can't make the big decision yet, so he focuses on a smaller one for now.

Monday at school, Castiel set aside his economics essay when Sam came in. “Hey, sorry I’m late, had to show up to English to give a speech. Ms. Talbot let me go first and then leave, but still.”

“You can’t be late if you have no obligation to be here,” Castiel said. “I’m glad you are, though. I have a question for you.”

“Oh? School or other stuff?” Sam asked.

Castiel hesitated. He’d been trying to find another way to get this information, because he didn’t want to get Sam’s hopes up. He couldn’t come up with anything, though. “Wolf stuff.”

“I’m still new at it, but I can try to answer,” Sam said.

That got a smile from Castiel. “You’ll be able to answer this one, I promise. Just… I still haven’t made a decision, so don’t take this as an indication of anything, all right?” Sam nodded. “What kind of collar do you have?”

“Plain leather. Dark green. And before you ask, I chose it but asked Dean if he thought it would look okay,” Sam said. “Neither of us have seen you as a wolf, so we can’t help you there.”

“Why green?” Castiel asked.

Sam shrugged, ducking his head just a little. “It’s Dean’s favorite color. That didn’t occur to me until a couple days after I’d picked it, but it may have been a subconscious thing? He’s really not gonna care what you pick, as long as you’re happy with it. Although if you’re coming with us, I would advise against pink and rhinestone, Dean takes any excuse he can to call me a girl. Like that’s supposed to be insulting.”

“Like I said, nothing’s decided yet,” Castiel said. “I was thinking, though, that it’s probably best if I don’t get a collar that resembles yours too closely. In case our wolves do coincidentally resemble each other.”

“Fair enough, and it makes it less likely one of us grabs the other’s by accident,” Sam said. “It’s strange, the thought of anyone but me or Dean handling my collar makes me want to growl. It’s a stupid decoration and a way of marking us in the less friendly states. Why am I so attached to it?”

“Research is ongoing,” Castiel said with an eyeroll. That was the answer the experts gave to a lot of questions about wolves. Such as how they survived the painful transformations twice a month, or why wolves occasionally turn on their handlers. Castiel had some suggestions on that one, but the human scientists never wanted to hear that it was as simple as wolves who resented their treatment enough to snap.

“Heh.” Sam settled in to do his work, and Castiel returned to his.

 

After school, Cas went to the pet store and found himself staring at collars. He didn’t know what exactly he was looking for, or even what size to get. The more he stared, the more uncertain he became. He needed a friend.

“Hey there! Picking out a new collar for your wolf?”

“I, um, actually…” Castiel caught himself. He glanced at the girl’s nametag. “Yes, Madison. That is exactly what I’m here for. But I’m finding I have no idea how to do it.”

“Well, I’m something of an expert,” Madison said with a big smile. “Are you more interested in appearance or comfort?”

“Comfort, although I do have some requirements for the appearance,” Castiel said. “I also don’t have a lot of money to spend on it.”

Madison nodded. “Okay, what size?”

“I don’t know,” Castiel said. “I didn’t think to measure his neck.”

“Okay, well, we can try to guess. Is he about your size?” Madison asked. Castiel nodded. “Wolves tend to have pretty close to the same size neck in both human and wolf form, so…” She held up her hands. “Okay, I realize this is gonna be really weird, but it’s the best way to get a sense short of asking you to try on collars.” Castiel held still as Madison wrapped her hands around his neck. He tensed against the instinct to run. Madison laughed a little and dropped her hands. “Feels like either a large medium or a small large. I’d get a large collar; if it’s too big you can always poke a new hole in it next time he needs it. And if he grows some, you won’t have to get a whole new collar.”

Castiel nodded. “That sounds fair. Do you have a recommendation for material?”

“Depends. Do you plan to stick to wolf-positive states, or will you be going to places he’ll have to wear it human?” Madison asked.

“I don't… we’ll be traveling to a lot of places,” Cas said. After all, even if he didn't go with the Winchesters, he was leaving. Best to plan ahead for being in the crueler states.

“In that case, I would recommend investing in leather,” Madison said. “I know you said you don’t have much money to spend, but we do have some cheap leather collars, and leather tends to hold up better to that kind of wear, and it’s not quite as obvious as the canvas collars. At first glance it just looks like a choker. Shame they can’t figure out how to get the wolf magic into the chain collars, those could almost pass for a weird necklace.”

Madison led the way to where some collars that fit Castiel’s description pretty well. Castiel looked at them. Even with the selection narrowed down this much, he still didn’t know. Eventually, he closed his eyes and put out a hand, grabbing hold of the first collar he touched. When he opened his eyes, he saw Madison holding back a smirk. It was a very plain collar in a vibrant blue, and when he checked the price, it was within his budget. Barely, once Castiel calculated the tax on it, but he had enough. “This one.”


	17. Lone Wolves and College

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas hears from Stanford. He lets that make the decision for him.

Even with the collar tucked into his bag, Castiel still hadn’t made a decision. Sam hadn’t brought it up at school, and though he’d gone to their house for dinner twice, Dean didn’t bring it up either. Cas wasn’t sure if they were doing it to avoid pressure, or because they didn’t really want him. A logical part of his brain told him they wouldn’t have offered if they didn’t, but logic didn’t work on this.

He’d made a decision the day he bought the collar, but it wasn’t one he was ready to share. It wasn’t the Winchesters’ business how he came to his decision. He’d decided that his fate was in Stanford’s hands. If he was approved for the scholarship, then he would join the pack.

The problem with that decision was that made waiting on news from Stanford almost impossible, and Sam was asking about that. He’d thought waiting for his original acceptance letters had been hard. He’d believed then that his entire future was riding on college. Now he knew what that was really like.

Sam was packing up to go to class when Mrs. Edelman came through the door. “Mail delivery,” she said, putting an envelope in Castiel’s hand. “Sam, if it’s all right with Castiel for you to stay, I’ll write you a note for class.”

“Sam can stay,” Cas said quickly. The cardinal red ink meant that this was, after all, likely to have a huge impact on Sam too. Sam set down his bag and watched as Castiel carefully opened the letter. “Dear Prospective Student…” Cas paused. That wasn’t exactly a good sign. “We regret the circumstances that have caused you to amend your application.”

Sam closed his eyes. “That doesn’t sound good.”

“No, it doesn’t,” Cas said. “As a wolf without a handler, you will face many obstacles in your path. There are many who believe that such wolves are inherently dangerous, and have no place among civilized society.”

“That’s bull,” Sam said. “You’re no more inherently dangerous than I am.”

Castiel smiled briefly, but not in humor. “Therefore, our legal team advises that accepting wolves without handlers to our campus should only be done with appropriate programs in place. First and foremost, we encourage you to seek a handler, for your own well-being as much as satisfying others that you are not a threat.”

Sam snorted. “Yeah, if it were that easy, we wouldn’t have lone wolves to begin with.”

“Hush, Sam,” Mrs. Edelman said. “That actually sounded hopeful.”

“It did,” Castiel said. “But not as hopeful as this: If you will sign the enclosed pledge to seek a handler and comply with all counseling requirements and other restrictions, spelled out in the pledge, then we are pleased to offer you the scholarship you require to attend. Should you find a handler, those restrictions will be lifted as soon as your new status is registered, along with whatever other changes must be made to accommodate your handler. We hope to see you this fall.”

Sam let out a whoop and threw his arms around Cas. “We’re gonna be classmates! You’re going, right? Even if you decide against Dean?”

“Yes. Yes, I’m going, of course I’m going,” Castiel said, returning the hug. “Sam… may I come for dinner tonight?”

“Course you can, I’ll let Dean know to expect you,” Sam said as he pulled away. “I won’t tell him about this, this is your news to share, but he’s not stupid and will probably figure out something really good happened today. And hey… congratulations.”

Sam left, as did Mrs. Edelman, and Castiel was left alone to look at the letter, to let it sink in that the sign he had waited for had come and that the decision was made. He could still change his mind, but he no longer wanted to. If he’d still had doubts, Sam’s reaction had put them to rest. He’d only mentioned the offer once, and that was in a way that acknowledged that Castiel still had to make the decision, that Sam wasn't assuming anything. And that Sam was eager to see him at Stanford regardless of how he chose.

Castiel glanced at the restrictions pledge, and decided against signing it now. The offer was valid until August 1st, so there was time to wait and make sure that this was going to work out. He had no idea what would happen during the full moon. Still, for the first time since that fateful morning where Castiel had first woken up furry, he actually felt happy. He slipped a hand into his bag, touching the collar. He hadn’t dared to try it on yet, for fear that he wouldn’t want to take it off. For fear that he might jinx something. Now felt like the time.


	18. Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas tells Sam and Dean of his decision, and they start making plans.

Sam had been right, of course. He hadn’t been home a whole minute before Dean was asking what happened at school that had him in such a good mood.

“Cas asked if he could come over for dinner, I said yes,” Sam said to deflect.

“Which is awesome, but that wouldn’t have you _this_ chipper,” Dean said. “What’s up?”

“Dean, I promised Cas I wouldn’t say anything, so unless you’re gonna pull handler rank on me, I’m not talking about it,” Sam said. Dean accepted that with reasonable grace. He kept the grumbling about stupid secretive brothers who wouldn’t share the good news with their awesome and really cool brothers to mutters and the occasional crack about Sam being a girl.

Sam was the one to answer the door when Castiel knocked. “Hey! Come on in.” He stood back and let Cas come in and set his bag down. Something looked different about him, and finally Sam realized what it was. The hope he’d been very carefully quashing and keeping hidden from Cas spilled out. “You’re wearing a collar?”

“I hadn’t intended to wear it tonight,” Cas said. “I don’t have to, and it does call attention to me and my wolf nature. I’d only meant to try it on, but once it was on and I had it adjusted to be comfortable, I found I didn’t want to remove it. I got stared at a bit at the library, but I didn’t think you or Dean would mind, and since it was Dean who gave me the money for it I thought he might like to see it.”

“Huh. I could not get mine off fast enough after the last full moon. In wolf form it wasn’t too bad, but in human form… ugh.” Sam shuddered a little. He was not looking forward to being in states where wolves had to wear their collars. He had a feeling Dean was going to keep to wolf-positive states despite Sam saying it was okay, for his own comfort as much as for Sam’s.

“You’ve never known what it’s like to not have a collar,” Castiel pointed out. “I bought this on Monday. I hadn’t dared to try it on until today, because I had a feeling this would happen.”

“Hey, Cas,” Dean said, finally making it out there. “Sorry, Dad called and didn’t feel right to hang up on him.”

“What did Dad have to say?” Sam asked.

“Wanted to know if we could head down to Georgia next week, he’s stuck in a case in Michigan and thought we might be able to get out there faster,” Dean said. “I told him we didn’t know yet whether we were leaving after graduation or after the full moon. He’s gonna kick the case to Bobby, Bobby’ll have someone who can get out there quicker than two and a half weeks.”

“Cool,” Sam said. “We might actually get to take that week off that we keep saying we’re going to every year, and every year, we end up finding a case that Dad thinks needs a Winchester’s touch.”

“Not this year,” Dean promised. “Whatever happens, we’re taking that week.”

There was a knock on the door, which startled Cas. Sam put a hand on his arm. “Relax, that’s food,” he said. Dean went to the door and paid the pizza guy.

“Sammy says we’re celebrating something,” Dean explained. “Wouldn’t tell me what, but I figure pizza’s always appropriate party food.”

“You… wow,” Cas said. “I just realized how long it’s been since I’ve had pizza. Thank you.”

“If you really want to thank me, then get me out of this suspense,” Dean said. Sam didn’t miss the surprised way Cas tensed up. “What are we celebrating?”

“Oh! I thought…” Castiel shook himself. “Of course. We’re celebrating my scholarship to Stanford.”

“Awesome!” Dean said, reaching over to give Cas a congratulatory shoulder punch.

“It’s conditional, but I can accept the conditions,” Castiel continued. “Checking in with a counselor, avoiding crowds, notifying my professors of my status. Things like that.”

“And you’re okay with that?” Dean asked quietly.

“If that’s what it takes to go to Stanford, then yes, I’m all right with that,” Cas said. “However, they also require that I seek a handler.”

Once again, hope flared within Sam. He’d figured Castiel would gloss over that part, to avoid awkwardness if nothing else. One look at Dean told him that Dean was thinking the same thing. Dean spoke up. “I’m not trying to pressure you or anything, but…”

“There’s no need,” Castiel said. “If Sam and I can get along during the full moon, then I would like to accept your offer. And if I have a handler, then the restrictions no longer apply.”

“Seriously? You’re gonna give me a chance?” Dean said, dropping his pizza. “This is gonna be awesome. But hey, listen hard, because I mean this. If you change your mind, if you ever want out… tell me. If you run away, I won’t hunt you down or anything, but I’d rather hear from you that it’s not working and that you’re leaving, so that I can at least make sure you’ve got some supplies and money to take with you.”

“Yes, sir,” Castiel said.

Dean rolled his eyes. “Look, I’m gonna go easy on you at first, you’ve been through a pretty rough time and you may need to do things differently for a while. But I much prefer being called Dean to sir or master or any of that other shit. Sir is my father.”

“Okay,” Castiel said. “What other rules do I need to know?”

Dean looked at Sam, who shrugged. He didn’t know what to tell Dean on this one. “Just act like you would normally, and if we’ve got a problem, we can address it as it comes up,” Dean eventually said. “You cut me some slack for not knowing what I’m doing as your handler, and I’ll cut you some slack for being new at being a Winchester.”

“Fair enough,” Castiel said.

The boys ate their pizza in silence for a while, too focused on their food for conversation. Sam dropped out early, something having just occurred to him. Bringing it up would be pushing Dean’s insistence that they were equal a lot further than he had yet, but eventually he decided that it was important enough. He did wait until he noticed Dean slowing down on the pizza consumption before saying, “Hey, um, Dean…”

“What, Sammy?”

“Since Cas is joining us…”

“On probation, until after the full moon,” Cas interrupted. “If we fight, I’m leaving so that Dean doesn’t have to figure out how to keep us separated on the road.”

“We get that, Cas. Go on, Sam,” Dean said.

“Can he stay here with us? We’ve never liked letting him go knowing…”

Dean and Cas were both staring at Sam, equally bewildered. “Thought that went without saying. He wants in the family, he’s in the family. Just have to figure out sleeping arrangements, but that's no big deal,” Dean said.

Now Cas was staring at Dean. “You want me to stay here?”

“Of course I do. The day we met you, when Sammy was telling me why he thought you were a lone wolf, he said that if you had a handler, there was no way you should be sleeping outside, and he’s right.”

“And if you’re here for a couple weeks or so before you change, that gets your scent around here too, better chance of us recognizing each other as pack if we’ve gotten it in our noses while we still have our full reasoning,” Sam said.

“Hadn’t thought of that,” Dean said. “Anything else you can think of to help improve our chances?”

“Not that you’d be willing to do,” Sam said. Dean shot him an odd look. “Hey, I’m sure there’s some sort of blood magic ritual, or there’s always the old-school empty out a room and lock us in there until we either come to terms or one of us kills the other.”

“Okay, yeah, not willing to do those,” Dean said. “Cas? Any ideas?”

Cas looked a little terrified. “Not… not any good ones,” he said. “Lone wolf stories rarely end this way.”

“If you think of something, don’t be afraid to speak up,” Dean said. "I really want this to work out."


	19. Full Moon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final test. Cas is family when everyone's human, but when two of the three lose their higher reasoning skills, they need to know if that will last.

The last week of school flew by in a blur for Castiel. Dean insisted that Cas had spent enough nights on his own, that he had a family now and there was no reason for him to be alone. After a couple days, Dean reminded him that he didn’t have to wear his collar human, but accepted Cas’s word that he was happier with it on. And while Dean treated him differently than he treated Sam sometimes, it was always about being more careful with his skittish new wolf.

The night before the transformation, Cas knew that if he had to walk away, it would break his heart. He was going to do it, if there was any kind of major problem, but he wanted so badly to stay.

“Right. I hate to do this, but I’m gonna lock you boys in your rooms and sleep out here on the couch,” Dean said as they cleaned up after supper. “While we’re all hoping that you two will just sniff each other’s butts or whatever it is wolves do to introduce themselves and then be best friends forever, truth is, we don’t know. So I don’t want to take the risk of you two meeting without me there to separate you if things turn bad. Okay?”

Sam nodded, unconcerned, but Cas felt the need to remind Dean of something. “We’re also not sure you can control me, Dean. It’s more likely, but there’s no guarantee that the handler-wolf bond is imprinted on me yet.”

Dean shrugged. “Won’t know until we try, will we. May as well find out tomorrow and get the worry over with. Now… my question: which of you do I let out first?”

“Sam,” Cas said immediately. “Cas,” Sam said at the same time.

“Helpful,” Dean said as the boys looked at each other and tried not to laugh.

“Cas is older, he’s been a wolf longer, and among families, the older wolves are dominant over the younger,” Sam said.

Cas shook his head. “That may be true, but that’s among families of blood. I’m adopted. There aren’t that many instances of adoption, but generally, adopted wolves are submissive to blood-related wolves. We’re close enough in age that it may not be a factor we even recognize.”

“I don’t have any actual evidence to support me on this, just an instinct, but Dean, if you bring Cas to meet me instead of taking me to meet Cas, it’ll probably go better. Maybe a territory thing, I don’t know,” Sam said. “We’ll figure out the dominance thing on our own.”

“Okay. So here’s the plan: when I wake up, I’m gonna get Sammy and bring him down here. Sam, you’ll stay here if I tell you to, right?” Sam nodded. “Then I go get Cas and bring him down. After that… we’ll just have to play it by ear.”

 

Dean was not the praying type. If God or angels or saints or any of that were real, they were probably dicks, just like everything else. But he still made a wish as he opened the door to Cas’s bedroom.

Cas was lying on the bed, head on his front paws. He perked up when Dean came in, and hopped down to come to Dean. “Hey there, Cas,” Dean said. He looked over the wolf carefully. Cas’s fur was lighter, more grey and less brown, and he was a little smaller, and his eyes were still blue. Dean knelt. “Let’s get this fixed for you, huh?” he said, loosening Cas’s collar a little. Cas held still while Dean worked, but his tail started wagging when Dean scratched his ears.

Dean breathed an internal sigh of relief. First hurdle cleared – Cas was behaving a lot like Sam did, which he figured meant that Cas accepted him as handler. “All right. I’m taking you to meet Sam. He’s mine, too, so try to get along, okay?”

Cas yipped, which Dean hoped was either agreement or a reminder that Cas was still closer to human intelligence than dog at the moment. Cas followed him closely as he walked out, heading for Sam.

Sam hopped up when he saw Dean, but dropped into a defensive crouch when he saw Cas. He growled. “Sammy, knock it off. It’s Cas,” Dean said.

Sam crept forward, slowly making his way toward Cas. As soon as he got close enough, Dean reached forward to stroke Sam’s fur. “Sam, Cas, play nice, okay?” He stood up and backed away, leaving the two wolves facing each other.

Sam started sniffing Cas all over. After a few sniffs, Cas started sniffing back, though he was a lot more hesitant. Eventually, Cas dropped, rolling over on his back. Sam kept sniffing, but made no move to attack Cas.

Dean started to relax as the day wore on. After breakfast, where he ended up tossing most of his bacon to the wolves because it was fun to watch them go after it, he took them out into the yard and let them run. Occasionally one or both would come to him for petting, which he was perfectly happy to provide. The first time Sam crashed into Cas, Dean jumped to his feet, but Sam just let out a triumphant bark and took off chasing a squirrel with Cas right behind him.

Dean took them back in when it started getting hot out, where both wolves promptly curled up for a nap. By nightfall, Dean wasn’t sure it was needed when he locked them in their rooms, but he did it anyway. Just in case.

If anything, day two went even smoother than day one. Day three, though… took a weird turn. Dean had been reading up on wolves, and of course he knew dogs were known for humping anything they could. So he probably should have seen it coming, knowing that Sam had a thing for Cas, but he was still surprised when Sam put his paws on Cas’s back.

“Hey! Sam! Come here.” Sam came running over. “None of that, understand?” Sam yipped, but Dean had no idea what that meant. “All right, go play, but behave yourself.”


	20. Time To Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys make the final call on adopting Cas.

When Sam woke up, the first thing on his mind was ripping off his collar. The second thing was the incident the day before. He didn’t know how Cas would react, but he was ashamed of himself. There wasn’t anything for it, he couldn’t change it, so all he could do was get dressed and go down to face the music.

“Mornin’, Sammy,” Dean said. “How you feeling?”

“Thanks for stopping me,” Sam said. “Have you seen Cas yet?”

“Nope. His backpack’s still here, though, so I’m pretty sure he didn’t run as soon as he changed back,” Dean said. “Any ideas how we can prevent this in the future, if Cas is willing to stay?”

“We don’t have to,” Cas said from the hallway. “It was at least partly my fault, and I should have said something earlier. Sam, I don’t blame you for anything. If you two are still willing to let me, I want to stay.”

“How is this your fault?” Dean asked.

“Wolves are a lot less complicated than humans when it comes to mating,” Cas said. “If you like another wolf, you either take them or… entice them. It’s all pheromones and instinct. That's one reason we're supposed to have handlers to watch us, so that if something like yesterday happens they can break it up if they think that's what's best for their wolf. Given that I’ve developed quite the crush on Sam, I should have said something before. Should have realized this would happen.”

“Why didn’t you?” Dean asked.

Castiel looked away, leaning against the doorframe. “Well, for one thing, I’m still on probation, and I didn’t know how to tell my handler that I liked the idea of mating with his established wolf. Especially since Sam trying to kill me was something that could have happened. I'm sorry.”

"Don't beat yourself up over this, no harm done, and it's out there so we can deal with it," Dean said. “Sammy? Thoughts?”

Sam reached out and offered a hand to Cas. “Dean, you’ve known I had a thing for Cas since that first night we talked about adopting him. I could’ve said something myself, and I didn’t. If it’s mutual, and you’re not going to pull handler rank on us and veto, then I don’t see any reason we’d need to try to prevent it.”

“I can… you know what, forget it, I don’t think I want to hear the answer to that question,” Dean said, making a face. “If you two are both okay with it, doesn’t affect me any. Although I'm not gonna stick around and watch, that would be weird.”

“So… I can stay?” Cas asked as he finally reached out and took the hand Sam offered.

“You’re family now,” Dean said. “And this family needs to hit the road soon. You guys ready to move out?”

“No, I have a question,” Sam said. He turned to Cas. “How do you want to handle things while we’re human? Because… I still like you, but I don’t want to rush into anything because of this.”

“I… I’ll go along with whatever you want to do that Dean will allow,” Cas said.

Dean rolled his eyes. “Cas, as long as you don’t do something to hurt Sam, or the other way around, it’s none of my business what you two do. I’ll give you the official formal permission or whatever, if you wanna do this, because I think you two would be good together and god knows if anyone deserves something that’ll make him happy it’s you. But I’m not gonna try to make either of you do anything you don’t want.”

Sam wasn’t exactly happy, either. “So, what, if I want a serious romantic relationship you’ll just… go along with that? Really? That’s not…”

“A serious romantic relationship is exactly what I want, but you sounded like you’re not sure what you want,” Cas said. “So if you decide to make this a wolf-only thing, I can accept that. If you want to take it slow, that’s probably a good idea. If you want to jump straight to something serious, well, that’s what I want even though my brain is telling me it’s probably not the best idea.”

Sam relaxed, a smile overtaking the worried look that hadn’t quite disappeared since he woke up. “Oh, okay. Yeah, I’m not exactly the type to bet everything all at once, so I’d prefer to take things slow. But, just so you know, that’s because I’m letting my brain overrule my heart. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Okay!” Dean clapped his hands. “So that’s settled, now are we ready to pack up and hit the road?”

“Yeah. Let’s get out of here,” Sam said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And there we go! Hope y'all enjoyed the trip. I know I did. I still don't know where this 'verse came from, but it's one of my favorites that I've ever created.

**Author's Note:**

> I honestly have no idea where this came from. I'm not entirely sure I know where it's going. Tags will be updated as the characters tell me what's happening.
> 
> Comments are love!


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